Christian Books on Marriage and Family: 15 Classics, Free to Read
If you want one classic Christian book on marriage and family, read John Angell James's The Family Monitor. It grew out of sermons on the household chapters of Ephesians, and it covers husbands and wives, choosing a spouse, parents and children in about six hours. If you want to start family worship, read Matthew Henry's sermon A Church in the House. It takes less than an hour and has moved many fathers and mothers to open the Bible at home. If you're raising young children, H. Clay Trumbull's Hints on Child-Training is wise and gentle.
What do the old writers teach about the home? They saw the family as God's first institution, older than the church or the state. Marriage is a covenant made before God, and believers should marry only in the Lord. Husbands are to love their wives as Christ loved the church, and wives to honor their husbands, and both owe each other faithfulness, patience and kindness. Above all, a Christian home should be a little church, with daily Scripture reading, prayer and praise, and parents who teach and train their children for Christ. They also knew that real happiness at home doesn't come from rules. It comes from real religion: Christ loved and obeyed in the house.
Here are fifteen of the best in TheWay Library, all free to read.
On marriage
1. The Family Monitor, by John Angell James
James was a Birmingham pastor for over fifty years, and this is his practical guide to the Christian household: the family as God's design, the mutual duties of husband and wife, the special duties of each, how to choose well in marriage, and the duties of parents and children. He insists that a mere profession of faith won't make a happy home.
The first which I mention, and which is the ground of all the rest, is love.
The Family Monitor, chapter 1
2. Thoughts on Marriage, by William Jay
Jay of Bath argues at length that Christians must marry "only in the Lord," and that piety is needed but prudence too. Shorter pieces follow on the mutual duties of husbands and wives, "The Wife's Advocate," a charge to a minister's wife and domestic happiness. This is a good book for single Christians thinking about marriage.
If love be withdrawn, wedded life is confinement, misery, hell.
Thoughts on Marriage, The Wife's Advocate
3. A Christian Directory, Part 2, by Richard Baxter
Baxter's "Christian Economics" is the fullest Puritan guide to the household: choosing a husband or wife, the necessity of family worship, the duties of husbands, wives, parents, children and servants, and keeping the Lord's Day. It is long, so read the chapter you need.
Parents that show much love to their children, may safely show severity when they commit a fault.
A Christian Directory, Part 2, chapter 10
See Who Was Richard Baxter? Read A Christian Directory, Part 2.
4. Making the Most of Life, by J. R. Miller
Short chapters on living for Christ in ordinary days. Read chapter 21, "Some Secrets of Happy Home Life," first. Miller speaks to husbands, wives and children in turn, and ends where every book here ends.
It may be said, in a word, that Christ himself is the one great, blessed secret of all home happiness.
Making the Most of Life, chapter 21
John Wesley's Works, volume 4 also holds a short treatise on the duties of husbands and wives that he abridged for his people. Read Making the Most of Life.
Family worship
5. A Church in the House, by Matthew Henry
Henry's sermon on Paul's greeting to Aquila, Priscilla "and the church that is in their house." He urges every household to be a little church, with morning and evening prayer, Scripture reading, singing, teaching the children and godly order, and he answers the excuses.
This will make your family- comforts double comforts, and your family-crosses but half crosses; it will turn a tent into a temple, a cottage into a palace.
A Church in the House
6. Thoughts on Family Worship, by James W. Alexander
The best full book on the subject. Alexander, a Princeton-trained Presbyterian pastor, gives the history of family worship, its good effects on parents, children, servants, the church and the nation, and plain directions on reading, praying and singing at home.
The children look more deeply into the parents' heart by the medium of family-prayer.
Thoughts on Family Worship, chapter 4
Read Thoughts on Family Worship.
7. The Great Duty of Family Religion, by George Whitefield
Whitefield's sermon on "As for me and my house, we will serve the Lord" is the fourth sermon in volume 5 of his Works. The great evangelist thought revival would never come until homes became praying homes again.
And, I believe, we must for ever despair of seeing a primitive spirit of piety revived in the world, till we are so happy as to see a revival of primitive family religion
The Works of George Whitefield, Vol. 5, Sermon IV
Raising children
8. Hints on Child-Training, by H. Clay Trumbull
Thirty short chapters of practical counsel from a father and Sunday school leader. Trumbull explains the difference between teaching and training, and gives wise advice on firmness, self-control, faith, the Sabbath, reading, companions, children's fears and never punishing in anger.
Will-training is an important element in child-training; but will-breaking has no part or place in the training of a child.
Hints on Child-Training, chapter 5
9. The Little Child's Book of Divinity, by John R. Macduff
Eight Sunday-evening talks between little Emma and her grandmother by the fire, explaining God, creation, the fall, Christ, the Spirit, judgment and heaven in simple question and answer. Read one aloud each week.
There is something terrible about the thought of a Judge; but there is nothing but love and joy in the thought of a Father!
The Little Child's Book of Divinity, Third Night
Read The Little Child's Book of Divinity.
10. The Two Bears and Other Sermons for Children, by J. C. Ryle
Eight short sermons Ryle preached to children, with stories and questions, on mocking, truthfulness, heaven and seeking the Lord early. See Who Was J. C. Ryle? Read The Two Bears.
11. Morning Bells, by Frances Ridley Havergal
A month of morning readings for little ones, each giving a child a text to carry through the day. A good way to start family devotions with young children. Our guide to the best classic daily devotionals lists more. Read Morning Bells.
For reading The Pilgrim's Progress with children, see our guide to Pilgrim's Progress for kids.
The home and the Bible
12. The Ministry of Home, by Octavius Winslow
Twenty addresses meant to be read aloud in the Christian home. The first, on "As for me and my house," is about the family itself; the rest are meditations for the household on Christ, suffering, the bereaved home, the tongue and casting burdens on God. Read The Ministry of Home.
13. Laws from Heaven for Life on Earth, by William Arnot
Short chapters on Proverbs, the Bible's own book of family wisdom: a mother's law, choosing companions, work, money, speech and drink, all pointed toward Christ. Read a chapter with your teenagers. Read Laws from Heaven.
Families who lived it
14. Memoirs of the Wesley Family, by Adam Clarke
The story of John and Charles Wesley's home at Epworth, drawn from family letters. The long chapter on Susanna Wesley, who raised a large family and taught each child herself, is the reason to read it. Her letter on raising children has been reprinted ever since.
In order to form the minds of the children, the first thing to be done is to conquer their will, and bring them to an obedient temper.
Memoirs of the Wesley Family, Mrs. Susanna Wesley
See Who Was John Wesley? Read Memoirs of the Wesley Family.
15. Memoirs of Mrs. Sarah Savage
Sarah Savage was the daughter of the Puritan Philip Henry and the sister of Matthew Henry. This memoir, drawn from her diaries, shows a devout wife and mother through work, prayer, illness and loss.
The sadness of my spirit makes me almost stupid; yet, in reflection, I will say — all is well.
Memoirs of the Life and Character of Mrs. Sarah Savage, Her Patience and Resignation under Affliction
Read the Memoirs of Sarah Savage.
Where to begin
If you're married or about to be, read The Family Monitor together, a chapter a week. If you've never led family worship, read Matthew Henry's sermon tonight and start tomorrow with one chapter of the Bible and a short prayer. Keep it short and keep it daily. If you're grieving a child, our guide to Christian books on grief has books written by parents who walked that road. More books are on the Family topic page.