C. H. Spurgeon's Autobiography, Vol. 2

IKN I came to deal with the: sacred and delicate task of writing the following chapters, to recorel the eve:nts of the years 1854 anel i(S5, two courses only se:emeel to ope:n be:fore me:; — the one:, to conceal, as gracefully as possible:, under conventional phraseology and common-place details, the: tender truth anel sweetness of our mutual love-story; — the other, to write: out of the fulness of my very soul, anel suffer my pen to describe: the: lair visions of the past as, one: by one, they gre:w again before my eyes into living and loving realities. 1 chose the latter alternative, I felt compelled to elo so. My hand has but obeyed the dictates of my heart, anel, I trust also, the: guidance of the: unerring Spirit.

It may be an unusual thing thus to reveal the clearest secrets of one’s past life; but I think, in this case:, I am justifies! in the course I have taken. My husband once said, “You may write; my life across the sky, I have: nothing to conceal;” anel I cannot withhold the: precious testimony which these hitherto sealed pages of his history be:ar to his singularly holy anel blameless character.

So, I have unlockeel my heart, and poured out its choicest memories. Some people may blame my prodigality; but I am convinced that the majority of reaelers will gather up, with reverent hands, the treasures I have thus scattered, anel hnel themselves greatly enriched by their possession.

It has cost me sighs, anel multiplied sorrows, as I have mourned over my vanished joys; but, on the other hand, it has drawn me very near to “the God of all consolation,” anel taught me to bless Him again anel again for having ever given me the priceless privilege of such a husband’s love.

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Many years ago, I read a most pathetic story, which is constantly recalled to mind as the duties of this compilation compel me to read the records of past years, and re-peruse the long-closed letters of my beloved, and live over a<>-ain the happy days when we were all-in-all to each other. 1 do not remember all the details of the incident which so impressed me, but the chief facts were these. A married couple were crossing one of the great glaciers of Alpine regions, when a fatal accident occurred. The husband fell down one of the huge crevasses which abound on all glaciers, — the rope broke, and the depth of the chasm was so great that no help could be rendered, nor could the body be recovered. Over the wile’s anguish at her loss, we must draw the veil of silence.

Forty years afterwards saw her, with the guide who had accompanied them at the time of the accident, staying at the nearest hotel to the loot of the glacier, waiting lor the sea of ice to give up its dead; lor, by the well-known law ol glacier-progression, the form of her long lost husband might be expected to appear, expelled from the mouth of the torrent, about that date. Patiently, and with unfailing constancy, they watched and waited, and their hopes were at last rewarded. One; day, the body was released from its prison in the ice, and the wile looked again on the features of him who had been so long parted from her!

lUit the pathos of the story lay in the lad that she was then an old woman, while the newly-rescued body was that of quite a young and robust man, so faithfully had the crystal casket preserved the jewel which it held so long. The forty years had left no wrinkles on that marble brow, Time’s withering lingers could not touch him in thai tomb; and so, lor a few brief moments, the aged lady saw the husband of her youth, as lie w.is in the days which were ^0110 for ever!

Somewhat similar has been my experience while preparing these chapters. I have stood, as it were, at the foot of the great glacier of Time, and looked with unspeakable tenderness on my beloved as I knew him in the days of his strength, when the clew of his youth was upon him, and the Lord had mack; him a mighty man among men. True, the cases are not altogether parallel, for I had my beloved with me all the forty years, and we grew old together; but his seven years in glory seem like half a century to me; and now, with the burden of declining years upon me, I am watching and waiting to see my loved OIK; again, — not as he was forty years or even seven years ago, but as he will be when I am called to rejoin him through the avenue of the grave, or at the coming ol our Lord Jesus Christ with all His saints. So I am waiting, and “looking* for that blessed hope, and the glorious appearing of the great God and our Saviour Jesus Christ.”

c. ii. STURGEON’S AUToniocRArnv.

*J)

The first time I saw my future husband, he occupied the pulpit of New Park Street Chapel on the memorable Sunday when he preached his first sermons there. I was no stranger to the place. Many a discourse had I there listened to from Pastor James Smith (afterwards of Cheltenham), — a quaint and rugged preacher, but ^ene well versed in the blessed art of bringing souls to Christ. Often had I seen him administer the ordinance of baptism to the

PASTOR JAMES SMITH.

candidates, wondering with a tearful longing whether I should ever be able thus to confess my faith in the Lord Jesus.

I can recall the old-fashioned, clapper figure of the senior deacon, of whom I stood very much in awe. He was a lawyer, and wore the silk stockings and knee-breeches clear to a former generation. When the time came to give out the hymns, he mounted an open desk immediately beneath the pulpit; and from where I sat, I had a side view of him. To the best of my remembrance, he was

S AUTOi;i()«,U.lri IV.

a short, stout man, and his roiund body, perched on his undraped legs, and clothed in a long-tailed coat, gave liini an unmistakable resemblance to a gigantic robin; and when he chirped out the verses o! the hymn in a piping”, twittering voice, 1 thought the likeness was complete!

Well also did know the curious pulpit without any stairs; it looked like a magnified swallow’s-nest, and ‘as entered from behind through a door in the wall. My childish imagination was always excited by the silent and “creepy” manner in which the minister made his appearance therein. One moment the big box would be empty,- the next, if I had but glanced down at Table or hymn-book, and raised my eyes again, there was the preacher, comfortably seated, or standing read)’ to commence the service! I found it very interesting, and though I knew there was a matter-of-fact door, through which the good man stepped into his rostrum, this knowledge was not allowed to interfere with, or even explain, the fanciful notions I loved to indulge in concernim, that mysterious entrance and exit. It was certainly somewhat singular that, in the very pulpit which had exercised such a charm over me, 1 should have mv first glimpse of the one who was to be the love of my heart, and the ludit of unearthly life. After Mr. Smith left, then; came, with the passing years, a sad time of barrenness and desolation upon the church at New Park Street; the cause languished, and almost died; and none even dreamed of the overwhelming blessing which the Lord had in store for the. remnant ot faithful people worshipping there.

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