To Young Mothers

“I call to remembrance the unfeigned faith that is im thee, which dwelt first in thy grandmother Lois, and thy mother Eunice” — 2 Timorsy i. 5. ‘The aged women likewise, that they may teach the younz women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, to be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed.” — Tirus ii..3-6.

Waar associations with all that is lovely are formed by that blissful word — a mother! To that sound the tenderest emotions of the human heart, whether it beat in the bosom of the savage or the sage, awaken. The beauty of that term is seen, and its power felt, alike by the prince and the peasant, the rustic and the philosopher. It is one of the first words which infant lips are taught. te: lisp, and the charm of which the infant heart is first to feel. It is a note to the music of which it is difficult to say whose soul most responsively vibrates, that of the parent or the child. Humanity, — however semi-brutalized by oppression, by ignorance, and even by vice, has rarely been sunk so log as to have the last spark of ma‘erna. love extite guished, or the last sensibility of this sind crushed out of it. This strength of woman’s love to her child must be turned to good account, and be directed in its exercises to the best and most useful purposes. There is this difference, and it is a momentous one, between the maternal instinct of the lower tribes and that of woman; the former goes no further than provision and protection; training forms no part of it. The same power which taught the parent bird or beast what habits belong to its nature, teaches also the offspring. The latter, without any pains bestowed on its education, or any solicitude cherished for its welfare, will learn the lessons of its existence by the intuitions of nature, and be capable of rising to its specific perfection, unaided either by the parent or the teacher. Not so the young of the human species; they also require provision and protection; but more than this they need instruction. And who must be their instructor? First of all, and chief of all, their MOTHER,

But, before we reason and descant upon the subject of a mother’s duties, let us look at raots. It is universally admitted that scarcely any great man has appeared in our world who did not owe much, if not most, in the formation of his character, to a mother’s influence. In a very useful little volume, by Dr. Jabez Burns, entitled, “The Mothers of the Wise and Good,” there is an extended series of biographical memorials of pious and judicious mothers, and eminent sons, amounting tp about fifty, in which are included Alfred the Great, Lord Bacon, Sir Isaac Newton, Dr. Samuel Johnson, Sir Will. iam Jones, General Washington, among the illustrious of this world; together with St. Augustin, President Edwards, Dr. Doddridge, Dr. Dwight, Mr. Newton, Mr. Cecil, Leigh Richmond, and many others among the good; all of whom were blessed with pious or eminently judicious mothers, and owed to them their eminence in the church or in the world. From among these I select the follow- ‘ng account of Mr. Cecil: Richard Cecil, of Lonjon, when but a young man, had pursued a bold and determined career, till, sunk in sin, hardening himself in infidelity, and instilling the same principles into others, there seemed no prospect of any change. His excellent mother, however, had performed her part, and still remembered that it was good, not only to pray always, but not to faint, or desist upon any account. At last, one night he lay sontemplating the case of his mother: “I see,” said he within himself, “two unquestionable facts: first, my mother is greatly afflicted in circumstances, body, and mind; and yet I see that she cheerfully bears up under al., vy the support she Jerives from constantly repairing to her closet and her Bible; secondly, tnat she has a secret spring of comfort, of which I know nothing; while I, whe give an unbounded loose to my appetites, and seek pleasure by every means, seldom or ever find it, If, however, there is such a seoret in religion, why may I not find it as well as my mother?” He im stantly rose and began to pray, but was soon damped, by recollecting that much of his mother’s comfort seemed to arise from her faith in Christ. Now, thought he, “this Christ I have ridiculed: He stands much in my way, and can form no part of my prayers.” In utter confusion he lay down again; but, in process of time, conviction of sin continuing, his difficulties were gradually removed, his objections answered. He now listened to those admonitions of his mother, which he had before affected to receive with pride and scorn; yet they had fixed themselves in his heart like a barbed arrow; and though the effects were concealed from her observation, yet tears would fall from his eyes as he passed along the street, from the impression she had made on his mind. Now he would discourse with her, and hear her without outrage, which revived her hopes, especially as he then attended the public worship of God. Thus he made some progress, but felt no small difficulty in separating from his favorite connections. Light, however, broke into his mind, till at last he discovered that Christ Jesus, so far from “standing in the way,” as he once thought, was, indeed, “the way, the truth, and the life, to all who come unto God by him.”

At a pastoral conference held not long since, at which about one hundred and twenty American clergymen, united in the bonds of a common faith, were assembled, each was invited to state the human instrumentality to which, under the Divine blessing, he attributed a change of heart. How many of these, think you, gave the honor of it to their mother? Of one hundred and twenty, above one hundred! Here, then, are facts, which are only selections from myriads of others, to prove a mother’s power, snd to demonstrate, at the same time, her responsibility. But how shall we account for this? What gives her this influence? What is the secret of her power? Several things.

First, there is, no doubt, the ordinance of God. He that created us, and formed the ties of social life, and who gives all the sweet influences and tender susceptibilities of our various relationships, appointed it to be so, that maternal power over the soul of her child should be thus mighty. It is God’s ordinance, and the woman who forgets or neglects this, is disobedient to a Divine institute. God has made the child to be peculiarly susceptible of this power over his nature,

Then comes a mother’s love. This is stronger, at any rate, more tender, than even a father’s. There is more of instinct, if not of reason, in her affection. She has had more to do with the phys. ical being of her child, having borne him in her womb, and fed him from her breast, and watched him in his cradle: all this naturally and necessarily generates a feeling which nothing else can produce. Now love is the great motive power in, and for, human conduct. “I drew them,” said God, “with bands of a man, with cords of love.” Here is the true philosophy of both man’s natural constitution and of evangelical religion. Human nature is made to be moved and governed by love; to be drawn with the cords of affection, rather than to be dragged with the chains of severity. Now, woman’s heart is made to love; and this comes out more gently, sweetly, and constrainingly, upon the. child, than from the other sex. It makes her more patient, more ingenious, more influential. Her words are more soft, her smile more winning, her frown more commanding, because less terrific and repulsive. The little floweret she has to nurture, opens its petals more readily to the mild beams of her countenance. Hence, to repeat an expression of Monod, already quoted in a former sermon, “The greatest moral power in the world is that which a mother exercises over her young child.” Nor is there much exaggeration in that other expression, “She who rocks the cradle, rules the world;” an expression, the truth and force of which will appear to be founded on the next particular.

The mother has first and most to do with the character, while it is yet in that flexible state to receive its shape. The earliest exercises of thought, emotion, will, and conscience, are all carried on under her eye. She has to do not only with the Jody in its infancy, but with the sow, in its childhood. Both mind and heart are ja her hands at that period, when they take their first start for good or for evil. The children learn to lisp their first words, and to form their first ideas, under her teaching,

They are almost always in her company, and are, insensibly to themselves, and imperceptibly to her, receiving a right or wrong bias from her. The first model of character they witness is hers; the first exhibitions of right and wrong in practice are what they see in her. They are the constant observers of the passions, the graces, the virtues, and the faults, which come forth in her words, temper, and actions. She is, therefore, unconsciously to herself, educating them, not only by designed teaching, but by all she does or says in their presence. Children are imitative creatures. During the minority of reason, imitation is the regent of the soul, and they who are least swayed by the former are most governed by the latter. Speech is the effect of imitation, not intuition; and as children so early and so insensibly learn to repeat sounds,so may they also learn to copy actions and habits. This, of course, applies to the mother in a fuller sense than it does to the father, just because she is more constantly with them in the early stages of their existence, It is, therefore, of immense importance that every one who sustains this relation should have a high idea of her own power. She must be deeply and duly impressed with the potency of her influence. This has peculiar force in reference to the mothers of the middling, and still more tn those of the working classes. In the upper circles of society, the task of educating, and even supporting the infant, is usually devolved upon hirelings, The nursery is not much, it is to be, feared, the resort of many titled or wealthy mothers. A: isto. cratic habits, in some cases, can be scarcely made to square with those of a maternal kind. Happy women, then, who are not lifted by rank or wealth out of the circle of those tender and constant assiduities which an infant family require. Happy women, out of whose hand fashionable etiquette or Juxurious indolence has not taken whet the poet so pleasingly characterizes as the —

‘* Delightful task to rear the tender thought, And teach the young idea how to shoot.”

Mothers, then, should be thoroughly acquainted with the work that is allotted to them. I speak not of the physical training of the children; this is not my department, nor primarily even their intellectual culture; but their social, moral, and religious education. A mother’s object and duty are, the formation of character. She has not merely to com: municate knowledge, but habits. Her department especially is to cultivate the heart, and to regulate the life. Her aim must be, not only what her children are to know, but what they are to be and do. She is to look at them as the future members of society, heads of families of their own, and probationers for eternity. This, I repeat, must be taken up as the primary idea — the formation of character for both worlds. Governesses, tutors, masters, will most probably be employed in the future intellectual training; but a mother’s part is from infancy to form habits. Many have no other idea of education than

- the communication of knowledge. Mucit has been said of late years on the distinction between instruction and education. They are by no means synonymous. The etymology.of the two.words is worth considering. To “inatruct,” is derived from a Latin word, which signifies to put on or in. To instruct is, therefore, simply to put knowledge. into the mind. The word “educate,” comes alao:from a Latin word, which signifies: to lead or draw.forth, To educate, therefore, means to draw out the faculties of the soul, to call into exercise and invigorate its intellectual and moral powers. Both together constitute the duty of those who have to form the character. Ideas must be poured in, and the recipient must be taught what do with them. We hear much said about choosing the best masters, and a great deal more about intelectuality, accomplishments, and other things of this nature, which may be well enough in their place and in their measure, but they are only subordinate to something higher and better. They are only the tinsel work in some eases, which embellishes the casket, and attracts the eye of the beholder; while the invaluable jewel it contains is left to comparative neglect. These things are nut the whole of education, nor even the best part of it. They are only the polish of the surface, but not the solid gold of the substance. A mother should look upon her offspring with the idea, “That child has to live in two worlds, and to act a part in both; and it is my duty to begin his education for both, and to lay in infancy the foundation of his character and happiness for time and eternity too. What ought to be my qualifications, and my diligence, for such a task?”

Ah, what? Deep thoughtfulness certainly on the momentous nature of your charge. It is a somewhat awful thing to be a parent, especially a mother, and to have this training of men and women, both for time and for eternity. A distinguished philosopher has said.that “all the world is but the pupil and disciple of female influence.” Every mother, therefore, has, so far as her individual influence goes, the world for her scholar. ‘Oh, woman, thy child’s welfare, for all time and all eternity too, depends much upon thy conduct toward him during the period he is under your influence in the first years of his being. To you is committed the care of the infant’s body, the healthfulness, the vigor, and comfort of which for all his future existence upon earth depend much upon you. What would be your feelings of poignant remorse, if by any neglect of yours, if by a fall, or an accident, the result of your carelessness, the poor babe was injured in his spine, or distorted in his limbs. Oh, to see that young cripple ever presenting to you the sad memorials of your guilty neglect. Ruined for life in bodily comfort, Yet what is this to the sadder spectacle of a deformed and crippled soul — a character distorted into crooked and frightful shapes — and to have the tormenting reflection — this, this was the result of your neglect! The poor child in the former case may have com. pensation by all the sweet influences of religious submission and consolation, and the fistressed mother assuage the anguish of remorse by the thought that her neglect may have been among the all things that worked together for good to her son; but where in the latter case is consolation to be obtained, or who can wonder that such a Rachel mourning over her lost child, and lost through b her neglect, refuses to be comforted.

Qualify yourself for maternal duties, above all things, by sincere and eminent piety. A mother should never forget that those little engaging creatures which sport about the room so gayly and so innocently, with all the unconsciousness of childhood, are young immortals; beings destined to eternity; creatures placed on earth on a probation for heaven; and that much will depend upon her whether their everlasting ages shall be spent by them in torment or in bliss. This is an all but overwhelming idea. It would almost seem as if solicitude about this matter would be of so overpowering a degree as to extinguish parental delight. For a mother to look at the babe that is feeding at her breast, and smiling so sweetly in her face, as if it meant the thanks it had not yet learnt to speak; or to watch his slumbers in the cradle, breathing so softly as if he lived without breathing at all, and then to feel her soul shivering and shuddering ‘in the dark shadow passing over her from such a reflection as this: ‘Oh, shouldst thou live to be a profligate in this world, and a fiend in the next!” Or, instead of having a reflection so harrowing to every maternal feeling, .ow delightful to exult in the hope that that dear babe will be a holy, useful, happy Christian on ea th, and then a glorified immortal in heaven. Such reflections ought to be sometimes in the mind of every parent. All should realize the sublime idea that their houses are the seminaries for eternity, their children the scholars, they the teachers, and evangelical religion the lesson. Yes, with every infant born into the family comes the injunction from God — “Take this child and bring it up for me.” It is one of God’s own children by creation, sent to be trained up in the way he should-go, that is, in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. Those parents who neglect the religious education of their children, whatever else they may impart, are more guilty than Herod. He slew the children of others — they their own. He slew only the body — they the soul. He slew them by hired assassins — they slay them themselves. We shudder at the cruelties of those who sacrificed their babes to Moloch; but how much more dreadful an immolation do ¢hey practice, who offer up their sons and daughters to Satan by neglecting their religious education, and leaving them to grow up in ignorance of God and their eternal destiny. But can any one, will any one teach, or teach effectually, that religion which they do not feel and practice themselves? Therefore, we say a mother’s heart must be deeply imbued with piety herself, if she would teach it to her children. Without this, a” she have the will to teach, the heart to prey, the right to hope? Oh, mothers, can you conceive of a higher, nobler elevation to which in your maternal relation you can rise, than when, to the opening ‘mind of your wondering child, you give the first idea of God? Or when you direct him to that Divine babe who was born at Bethlehem, was subject to his parents, grew into that Saviour who said, “Suffer the little children to come unto me,” and took them in his arms, and blessed them, and then died for their salvation upon the cross. Or, than when you talk to them of heaven, the dwelling-place of God and of his angels. Oh, to see the first look of holy inquisitiveness, and the first tear of infant piety start into the eye — to hear the first question of concern, or the first breathing of prayer from infant lips! How has many a woman’s heart, amid such scenes, swelled with delight, till, in an ecstacy of feeling, she sunk upon her knees, and breathed a mother’s prayer over the child of her heart, while he looked wonderingly up, and felt a mysterious power come over him, which he could neither fully express nor understand. Your religion, if it be

genuine, will teach you at once the greatness of the work, and your own insufficiency to perform it aright in your own strength. Your business is to train mortals for earth, and immortal beings for God, heaven, and eternity. Even an apostle, in the view of such an object, exclaimed: “And who is sufficient for these things?” Your work, as to its design, is the same as his, and you, like him, have the depravity of human nature to contend with, and all the difficulties arising from your own weakness and sinfulness. A mistake, either in your sentiments, your feelings, or your example, may be fatal to your children’s eternal welfare, Cultivate, then, a trembling consciousness of your own insufficiency, and cast yourselves, by believing, constant, and fervent prayer, upon God. Be, in an eminent sense, praying mothers. Distrust yourselves, and then clothe yourselves, by believing prayer, with Omnipotence.

Do not forget what we have already said, that affection is the golden key fitted by God to the wards of the lock in every human heart, to the application of which the bolts that nothing else could move will fly back and open with ease. Severity is out of place in any one, but most of all in woman. But beware of allowing affection to degenerate into a fond and foolish indulgence. A judicious love is as remote from this, on the one hand, as it is from moroseness and cruelty on the other. For if severity has slain its thousands, an injudicious and pampering indulgence has slain its tens of thousands, Fathers are apt to err in the former extreme, mothers in the latter. And it not unfrequently happens that these extremes are played off against each other. The father, afraid that the mother will spoil the child by indulgence, adopts a harsh treatment to counteract the mischief of his wife’s excessive fondness; while the wife compensates to the child for the severity of her husband by her own excessive attention to the child’s gratification. Thus, like the sharp frost by night, and the hot sun by day, operating in spring to the destruction of the blossom on which their antagonistic influences are made to bear, the opposing treatment of the parents ruins the hapless child that is the subject of it.*

Still, while I enjoin affection, it must not be allowed to impair authority. A parent must not be a tyrant, so neither must he be a slave to his children. It is a painful, and to the parents a reproachful spectacle, to see a family like a state where rebellion reigns. rampant, the father deposed, the scepter broken, and the insurgent children possessed of sovereign rule. A mother, as well as a father, must be obeyed; and it is her own fault if she is not. A persevering system of government, where the reins are held tightly in the hand of love, will be sure to produce submission at last. But

One of the most artistic as well as instructive charac. ters in that wonderful book which has burst on this country as well as the United States of America, as a literary phenomenon, is that little imp of ignorance and wickedness which slavery had made half idiot and half demon, but who, by the touch of the magic wand of love, rose up from the degradation into which the heel of oppression had trodden her, a new creature in Christ Jesus. There is more of the true philosophy of human nature and of Christianity in that example, than in all the volumes which writers on humanity have ever written. And had that extraordinary volume been written for the exhibition of no other character than that, by which to show what love can do for the most hopeless subjects, it would not have been published im vain.

386 YOUNG MOTHER».

then it must be a mixture of kindness, wisdom, and authority. Submission must be felt by a child to be a duty yielded to authority, and not merely a something won by affection. Authority must not stiffen into severity, nor love degenerate into coaxing. Commands should be obeyed, not only because it is pleasant but right to do so.

A judicious mother will exercise much diserimtnation, and adapt her treatment to the disposition of her children. There are as many varieties of temperament in some families as there are children. No two are precisely alike in their minds and character any more than in their persons. One is forward and obtrusive, and should be checked and rebuked — another is timid and retiring, and needs to be encouraged and emboldened. One is more easily wrought upon by appeals to hope — another by fear. One is too close and reserved, and needs to have frankness and communicativeness encouraged — another is too open and ingenuous, and should be taught caution and self-restraint. Every child should be separate study. Quackery should be banished from education as well as from medicine. One treatment will no more suit all minds, than one medicine or kind of food, all bodies, A woman who does not know the peculiar dispositions of ad her children, and does not adapt her treatment to them, must be a very indifferent mother.

The woman who would fulfill the duties of her relationship, must surrender herself to her mission, and be content to make some sacrifices, and enduie some privations. Who can witness the patient submission of the mother-bird to such solitude and self-denial, during the term of incubation, without admiration at that quiet and willing separation which instinct teaches her to make from her usual liberty and enjoyments? A woman must be willing, for the sake of her children, to do, under the influence of reason and religion, what the bird does from the unintelligent impulses of nature. Her children are a charge for which she must forego some of the enjoy ments of social life, and even some of the pleasures of social religion. She who would have a maternal power over her children, must give her company to them. It is not for her to be ever craving after parties, or to feel it a hardship that she is denied them. ‘The secret of her beneficent influence lies in a life of retirement. Hence the exhortation of the apostle in the text, to the matrons of his time, “To teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, to be devout, chaste, keepers at home.” We would not have a woman incarcerated in her own house, so as -never to go abroad or enter into company. She who is devoted to her family needs occasional relaxation amid the pleasures of society, and especially the exhilarating engagements of public worship. There are some mothers who are such absolute slaves to their children that they scarcely ever stir from home even to the house of God. This is an error in one extreme, which might be avoided by method and dispatch. But there is an opposite extreme in those who, even for the benefit of their children, will deny themselves neither the pleasure of social parties, nor the gratification of public meetings, The woman who is not prepared to make many sacrifices of this kind, for the sake of her children, and her home, and her husband, should never think of entering into wedded life.

Be ingenious, inventive, and studious, as to the best method of gaining the attention, and informing the minds of your children while young. There are too many who imagine that education, and especially religious education, consists in just hearing a chapter read, a catechism taught, or a hymn repeated, and that when this is done, all is done. The memory is the only faculty they cultivate — the intellect, affections, and conscience, are wholly neglected. A Christian mother should set herself to invent the best mode of gaining attention, and keeping it; and she should never weary it, or keep it so long that it wanders off itself. How ingenious was the device of Doddridge’s mother in teaching him Scripture history, by the Dutch tiles of the chimney-place. The illustrated works which, in this fertile age, are perpetually issuing from the press, afford advantages for eonveying both secular and sacred knowledge, of which bygone times knew nothing.

Be familiar in your religious instruction. The freedom of incidental conversation, rather than the formality of set and stated lessons — the introduetion of religious topics in the common intercourse of life, rather than the grave and forbidding annunciation of a change from secular to sacred subjects; and the habit of referring all things to God, and comparing the truths and maxims of the Bible with the events of every hour, rather than the mere lighting of a Sabbath lamp, and forcing all things out of their current, when the season of devotion returns — these are the means of opening the avenues to the youthful heart, and rendering religion, with its great. Author, the object not of aversion or terror; not only of cold and distant homage, but of mingled reverence and love. On this point nothing can be more just and philosophic, any more than of higher obligation, than the direction once communicated from the source of infinite wisdom, “These words, which I command thee this day, shall be in thine heart; and thou shalt teach them diligently unto thy children, and shalt talk of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou liest down, and when thou risest up” — Deut. vi. 6-8.

Mothers, invested as you are with such an influence, often dwell upon your responsibility. With such a power vested in you by God, you are responsible to your children themselves. Every time their infant or adult voices repeat that word — “My mother,” so sweet, so musical to your heart, they urge their claims upon your best and most devoted attention. This very sound in your ears should awaken the deepest emotions of your soul, and the most faithful admonitions of your ccrscience. You are responsible to your husbands. They intrust the education of their children to you. They seem to say, “We will work for their support, and leave the early education of their minds to you. We will hereafter share all the obligation of instruction, and the care of their minds and characters with you, but at present, while they are so young, we devolve this duty upon you.” You are responsible to the church of God: for family education is, or ought to be, in the families of the godly, the chief means of conversion. It is a fatal error for Christian parents to look to the ministers of religion for the conversion of their children. And, alas! it is the error of the day. The pulpit is looked to for those benefits which should flow from the parents’ chair. Our churches, therefore, have weighty and righteous claims upon parents, and especially upon mothers. Nor does your responsibility stop here, for society at large looks to you for that beneficial influence which you are capable of exerting. I repeat, here, the well-known anecdote, and which I have given, I believe, in another work. Napoleon once asked Madam Campan what the French nation most needed, in order that her youth might be properly educated. Her reply was compressed in one word — ‘“Mothers!” And it was a wise reply. Not the French nation only, the world needs them — Christian, intelligent, well-trained, devoted women, to whom the destinies of the rising generation may be safely intrusted. That woman on whose domestic hearth, and by whose judicious maternal]

ae love, a family of industrious, godly, and public spirited sons, or of modest, kind-hearted, prudent, and pious daughters, are trained for future life, is an ornament of her country, a benefactress to her species, and a blessing to posterity. I again and emphatically say, mothers understand, feel, and remember your responsibility.

But hitherto, it might be said, the sermon does not answer to its title, as intended for, and addressed to, young mothers. We will, therefore, now give it a special bearing upon their case. It has been my object, first of all, to set forth the subject of maternal duty and responsibility in its general aspect, apart from its relation to those to whom they are new, that they may see it in its widest and most comprehensive bearing, before they are reminded of its special bearing on their case. This, I am aware, will give the appearance of a repetition in the second part of the sermon, of some things that were advanced in the first. But such repetitions are sometimes beneficial. In addition, therefore, to what has been said on maternal duties in general, I shall now submit some other matters for your special consideration.

Too many, it is to be feared, enter upon this momentous business without consideration, and equally, as may: be expected, without preparation or qualification. It is indeed a pitiable sight, to lcok into the state of some families, and behold the hap-Jess condition of the poor children, who have the misfortune to be on the hands of a weak, foolish, and incompetent woman. Perhaps, after all, this may be traced one step further back, and it might be found that they are incompetent, because their mothers were so before them. Thus the mischief perpetuates itself from generation to generation.

In all things it is of importance to begin well. The beginning usually determines the progress. and the close. Errors, both in theory and practice, however long and pertinaciously persisted in, may, by intelligence, determination, and the blessing of God, be corrected. Reformation would be otherwise hopeless. But how much better and easier is it to avoid faults than to mend them. Many mothers have seen their mistakes when it was too late to correct them. Their children have grown up under the influence of a bad systém of domestic government and maternal guidance, and have acquired a fixedness of bad habit which no subsequent wisdom, firmness, severity, or affection, could correct; and the parents have had to pour out bitter but unavailing regrets, that they had not begun life with those views of their duties with which they are now closing it. If a mother begins well, she is likely to continue well, and the same is true if she begin ill. Her conduct toward her first child is likely, of course, to determine her conduct for all that jollow. How momentous is it, then, at this stage of her domestic history, to weigh well, and solemnly, and prayerfully, her responsible situation.

Indeed, it is quite clear that this subject ought not to be driven off by any wife till she becomes a mother. The very prospect ought to lead to a due preparation for the expected new duties; for these

commence with the earliest anticipations of sustaining the maternal character. It becomes us to prepare ourselves for any situation into which we have a confident expectation of soon entering. Forethought is given to man for the purpose of meeting with propriety the situation and its duties to which we are looking forward. The woman who never studies matérnal responsibilities and duties, till she is called actually to sustain them, is not very likely to do herself much credit in that very important relationship. Instinct will teach tho parent bird, or beast, or fish, or insect, all that is necessary for the well-being of their young; but not the human parent. Here, study, reflection, forethought, and determination, are indispensable. Unhappily a young wife, in prospect of giving birth to 4 child, is, in some cases, so bowed down with an unnecessary solicitude about her own safety; and, in others, so absorbed with the preparations which are made for the physical well-being and the elegant habiliments of the expected visitant, as to forget to prepare her. self for those more important duties which devolve upon her, in relation to the mind, and heart, and conscience, of her child. A mother who wishes to fulfill her duties to her children, should take especial

pains to educate herself for those momentous ‘unetions. She should read, to store her mind with

knowledge; she should reflect, observe, and gain

useful information from every quartet. Yet Y*”- ciples should be fixed, her plans laid, her purposes formed. She must cultivate all those habits and tempers which will fit her to teach and to govern. She must seck to acquire thoughtfulness, careful vigilance, quick observation, and discretion in various forms. Habits of activity and dispatch, order and regularity, are indispensable; so is the exercise of all the good and benevolent feelings. She must acquire the union of gentleness and firmness, patience and the entire command of temper. It is of immense importance, also, that she should have a correct knowledge of human nature, and the mechanism of the human heart. And, above all things let her remember, that piety is the vivifying spirit of all excellence, and example the most powerful means to enforce it. She should set out with the recollection never absent from her mind, that children have both eyes and ears for attention to a mother’s conduct. Thus prepare yourself for your important functions, and also carry on the education of yourself, simultaneously with that of your children. There are few situations which more imperatively require preparation, and yet few that receive less,

So, again, when the maternal relationship is actually formed, there is, with some mothers, such a solicitude about the health and comfort of the babe, such an engrossing attention to all physical matters, united with such an exuberant delight in the child, as a child, such a mother’s pride and joyousness in her boy — that the mind is diverted, by these circumstances, from all those serious thoughts and solemn reflections which ought to be awakened by the consideration, that a rational, immortal, and lapsed creature, is committed to her charge, to be trained for both worlds. Thus the attention is absorbed month after month, while all this while the infant faculties are developing; judgment, will, affection, and conscience, at least, as to their capabilities, are opening, but neglected, and the natural bias to evil grows, unnoticed and unchecked. The very time when a judicious care over the formation of character could be most advantageously exerted, is suffered to pass by unimproved; passion is allowed to strengthen, unrestrained; self-will, to attain a resoluteness which stiffens into obstinacy; and the careless mother, who, at some time or other, intended to begin a system of moral training, but always saying, there is time enough yet, when the reason is a little more strengthened — wonders, when she does commence, that the subject of her discipline is so difficult to manage. And even then, she has so neglected to prepare herself for her duties, that she knows not how to set about them, or what, in fact, she has to do. An ill-managed child continues growing, not only in stature and in strength, but in his wayward disposition and obstinate self-will. The poor mother has no control; and, as to the father, he is toa much taken up with the cares of business to aid his imperfect helpmate; and thus the scene is exhibited, described by Solomon, of “a child left to himself.” Another and another are added to this first-born, and are governed, mis. governed, or not governed at all; and there are soon seen, in rude, disobedient, and ill-natured children, perhaps, at length, profligate sons, and vain, silly daughters, the sad fruits of the want of maternal wisdom.

Young mothers, begin well then. Manage that first child with judgment; put forth all your skill, all your affection, all your diligence and devotedness, in training htm; and the habit thus acquired, all will be comparatively easy with the others that follow. It is the novelty of that first child, the new affections which it calls forth, and the new interest that it makes, that are likely without care to throw you off your guard, and divert your attention from the great work of moral training: The first child makes the good or injudicious mother!

And as it is of immense consequence to begin your maternal excellence with the first child, so is it of equal importance to him, and to every one that is added, as I have already said, to begin early. “Education,” it has been beautifully observed, “does not begin with the alphabet. It begins with a mother’s look; with a father’s nod of approbation, or sign of reproof; with a sister’s gentle pressure of the hand, or a brother’s noble act of forbearance; with a handful of flowers in green dells, or on hills, or in daisy meadows; with creeping ants, and almost imperceptible emmets; with humming bees, and glass bee-hives; with pleasant walks in shady lanes, and with thoughts directed in affection.

ate and kindly tones and words to nature, to beauty, to the practice of benevolence, and to the remem. brance of Him who is the fountain of all good.” Yes, and even before all this can be done, and lessons of instruction can be taught the child from flowers, and insects, and birds, the moral training can commence with what we have already mentioned — a mother’s look, her nod of approbaticm, or sign of reproof. One of the greatest mistakes into which mothers fall, is that of supposing that the first two or three years of the child’s life are unimportant as regards his training. The truth is, that as regards the formation of character, these are the most important of all. It has been truly said, that from the impressions made, the principles implanted, and the habits formed during these years, the child’s character for time and eternity may take its complexion. It is perfectly clear that a child, before he can speak, is susceptible of moral training. The conscience, or moral sense may, by judicious woman, be developed soon after, if not before the child has spent his first birthday. How early may he be made to distinguish between what his mother considers right and wrong, between what will please, and what will displease her. Why, the brute creatures will do this; and if chey can be ‘taught this, may not very young children? It is admitted that there is more of reason in many brutes than in very young children. Still, even young animals may be trained to know what they may, and what they may not do; and so may very young children. We often hear mothers say, their children are too young to be taught obedience. The mother who acts upon this maxim, that children may have their own way for a certain number of years, or even months, will find, to her cost, that that lesson, at least, will not speedily be forgotten. Moral training may and should precede that which is intellectual. The cultivation of the affections and the conscience should be the commencement of education, and this will help all the rest.

There is in some women a timidity and distrust of their own capability, which paralyzes or prevents the endeavors which they could make if they would only believe in their own power. Every woman of good, plain understanding can do more than she imagines for the formation of her children’s character. And what she is deficient in, let her supply by reading. No mother, however qualified, should neglect this.* Every one may learn something from others. Fearful and timid, and somewhat anxious mothers, be not afraid! Prayer will bring God’s help and God’s blessing.

Injudicious indulgence is the most common, as it is the most injurious danger into which a young mother can fall. Be kind; you ought to be. An

* Tagain recommend Mrs, Ellis’s works — and to mothers, her book addressed to ‘‘ The Mothers of England.” Mrs. Sandford’s work, already quoted, as well as recommended. ‘‘Woman’s Mission,” and Monod’s book. And especially let young mothers take in that admirable periodical, * The British Mother’s Magazine,” edited by Mrs. Bakewell.

unloving, hard-hearted mother is a double libel upon her sex and her relationship. Love is her power, her instrument, her talisman. She can do nothing, worse than nothing, without it. But then her love must be like that of the Divine Parent, who said, “As many as I love, I rebuke and chasten.” Woman, can you say No to a child, when with winning smiles, or beseeching voice, or weeping eyes, he asks for what it is not good he should receive? Can you take from him what is likely to be injurious, and what will put him to pain to surrender? Can you correct him for his faults when your heart rises up in opposition to your judgment? Can you put him from your arms, at a proper season for so doing, when he clings to your neck and cries to remain? Can you exact obedience in, to him a dificult, but to you, a necessary duty? Woman, I ask you can you stand out against a child’s tears, resolute in purpose, unyielding in demand, and first conquer your own heart, so stoutly resisting you in order to conquer his? Or do you allow yourself to be subdued to put an end to the contest, and by soothing his sufferings foster the temper which ought to be eradicated at any pains and any cost? She who can not answer all this in the affirmative is not fit to bea mother. There must be discipline ina family. The parent must be obeyed. Give up this, and you train your children for evil and not for good. Here, again, I say begin early. Put on the soft and easy yoke early. The horse is broken in while a colt. Wild beasts are tamed while yet they are young. Both the human species end animals soon grow beyond the power of discipline.

A young mother is apt to devolve too much of the care and early training of her children upon servan‘s. Much of what may be called the drudgery of managing children must, of necessity, be remitted to them; but a wise woman will have her children as much with her as possible. Next to mothers, our nurse-maids are the most influential class of the community, as regards young children. They and nursery governesses are, to a great extent, the educators of the community. These, when carrying the children in their arms, or leading them out for air and exercise, or attending upon them in the nursery, or dressing or undressing them, or, indeed, however they may be employed for them, are forming them to good or evil habits. If multitudes are spoiled by mothers, multitudes more are spoiled by servants; and some of the latter class have undone all the good the former have done. Of what importance is it, then, that you should be careful as to the persons you admit to your families in this capacity, to whom to intrust your children’s minds, and hearts, and consciences; for, depend upon it, they have the care of those, as well as of their bodies.

Need I say to you, that all you do in training up your children in the way they should go, should bear directly or indirectly on their eternal welfare; and if J seem to advert to this subject with a frequency that looks like tautology, Jet its tremendous importance, and its too frequent and too great neglect, be my apology. You will not overlook, az we have already remarked, the intellectual training of your children’s minds, but their moral and religious education will, I hope, be with you the chief object of solicitude. Viewing your children as immortal beings destined to eternity, and capable of the enjoyments of heaven, you will labor, even from infancy, to imbue their minds with religious ideas, It is immortality which rescues from littleness and insignificance all that it appertains to, and hence arises in no inconsiderable degree the exalted honor of a mother. “She has given birth, by the sovereign ordination of the Almighty, not to a being of & mere momentary existence, whose life will perish like that of the beast of the field, but to an im. mortal! Her sucking infant, feeble and helpless as it may appear, possesses within its bosom a rational soul, an intellectual power, a spirit which all-devouring time can not destroy; which can never die, but which will outlive the splendors of the glorious sun, and the burning brilliancy of all the material part of heaven. Throughout the infinite ages of eternity, when all these shall have served their purpose and answered the beneficent end of their crea» tion, and shall have been blotted out from thei position in the immense regions of space, the soul of the humblest child will shine and improve before the eternal throne, being filled with holy delight and divine love, and ever active in the praises of its blessed Creator.” Mothers, such is your dignity — - such your exalted honors. Feel and woos your. oe rich distinction in being called to educate the sons and daughters of the Lord God Almighty, and preparing the holy family who are to dwell in those many mansions of his Father’s house, which the Lord Jesus is gone to prepare.

Give yourselves up to this glorious work. But be judicious in all you do, lest you produce a prey udice against, instead of a prepossession on behalf of, true religion. Let your warmest affection, your greatest cheerfulness, your most engaging smiles be put on when you teach religion to your children. Approach as near as possible to a seraph form. Be you religion in all its beauty, loveliness, sanctity, and ineffable sweetness. Let them see it in your character as well as hear it from your lips. And especially be careful not to enforce as a task what should be proposed as an object of hope and a source of delight. Let them see in you, that piety, if in one respect it is a straight and narrow path, is in another a way of pleasantness and a path of peace. Do not inflict upon them as a punishment for offenses the learning of Scripture and of hymns; and thus convert religion, which is the foretaste of heaven, into a penance which shall be to them like being tormented before their time. Especially do not make the Sabbath a day of gloom instead of gladness, by such an accumulation of services as shall cause the day of rest to be more physically irksome than the common labors of the week.

And can it be necessary, after what I have said in a former part of this sermon, to admonish you again to pray for and with your children. How have a mother’s prayers been blessed to her children. John Randolph, a distinguished American statesman, who had been much exposed to the seductions of infidelity in the society into which he had been thrown by his position, thus accounted to a gentleman, with whom he was conversing, for his preservation: “I believe I should have been swept away by the flood of French infidelity, if it had not been for one thing — the remembrance of the time, when my sainted mother used to make me kneel by her side, taking my little hands folded in hers, and cause me to repeat the Lord’s prayer.”

“On the east end of Long Island, in one of the most secluded spots in this country (America), more than thirty years ago, a mother, whose rare intellectual and moral endowments were known to but few, made this simple record: ‘This morning I rose very early to pray for my children; and especially that my sons may ‘be ministers and missionaries of Jesus Christ.’

“A number of years after, a friend, who was present, thus describes this mother’s dying hour: ‘Owing to extreme weakness, her mind wandered, and her conversation was broken; but as she entered the valley of the shadow of death, her soul lighted up and gilded its darkness, She made a feeling and most appropriate prayer, and told her husband that her views and anticipations had beén stich, that she could scarcely sustain them; and that if they had been increased she should bane Yes overwhelmed; that her Saviour had blessed her with constant peace, and that, through all her sickness, she had never prayed for life. She dedicated her five sons to God as ministers and missionaries of Jesus Christ, and said that her greatest desire was, that her children might be trained up for God.

“¢She spoke with joy of the advancement of the kingdom of Christ, and of the glorious day now ushering in. She attempted to speak to her children, but was so exhausted, and their cries and sobs were such, that she could say but little. Her husband then made a prayer, in which he gave her back to God, and dedicated all they held in common, to him. She then fell into a sweet sleep, from which she awoke in heaven.’

“The prayers of this mother have been answered. All her eight children have been ‘trained up for God.’ Her five sons are all ‘ministers and missionaries of Jesus Christ:’ and the late Rev. George Beecher is the first of her offspring whom she has welcomed to heaven.”. And one of her daughters is the lady already alluded to in this discourse, who has obtained a world-wide fame by her elegant, benevolent, and pathetic story against slavery. In that lady and her work, as well as in her able and learned brothers, we see the fruit of a mother’s prayers.

Take with you the following maxims, as summing up all that has been said:

Though a child’s character is not entirely created by the circumstances in which he is placed, espe eially as regards his mother, it is powerfully influenced by them.

Education is designed to form character, and not merely to communicate instruction. Agesilaus, king of Sparta, when asked what it was in which youth ought principally to be instructed, replied, “In that which they have most need to practice when men,”

Obedience is the first thing a mother has to teach; first, both in order and time, and the foundation of all the rest. Obedience must first be taught as a ’ habit, and soon after inculcated as a duty.

A mother should assiduously cultivate the spirit of curiosity in a child, and, instead of always calling him to learn, should prompt his desire to be informed.

Young children must be sometimes contradicted in their wishes — but never merely for the purpose of teaching them submission, by taking from them same thing they are pleased with.

Habits of employment, and a love of useful employment, should be taught to children; they are not so mischievous, for the mere love of mischief, as they are supposed to be. If they destroy articles, it is sometimes for the purpose of investigation, and, oftener still, for want of proper employment, which ought to be furnished to them. In very early childhood, a love of industry and honest independence may be instilled into a child, by teaching him that it is honorable to be usefully employed. One little child may feel the pleasure wna. yremhen the duty of benevolence, by doing something for the comfort of a tender babe still more helpless than itself.

It is of the first importance for a mother to establish in the mind of her child, an entire confidence in herself — in her wisdom, kindness, truth, and irresistible authority.

Truth, sincerity, candor, and ingenuousness are cardinal virtues to be taught to children. Simplicity is the beauty of a child’s character; and he should be taught from the beginning to act upon principle, and not for the sake of being well thought of or rewarded.

Domestic affections should be most assiduously cultivated. When the second baby is born, the first child should, if old enough to understand the matter, be congratulated, and taught to regard it as an acquisition by which his happiness is to be increased, and in whose welfare he is to take an interest, in conjunction with his parents. The child who is taught affectionate obedience to parents, and justice and kindness toward his little equals round the domestic hearth, is being trained to fill with propriety the station and relations of future life.

Out of the babe grows the child; from the child, the youth; from the youth, the man; and from the man, the immortal — and that immortal will be an heir of glory or a child of perdition. Let this be remembered from the beginning, and ever acted upon.

Discipline in a family is what the public admin.

istration of justice is to a state; where it is wanting, there may be very good laws, but they will remain a dead letter, and the reign of crime and confusion be the certain consequence.

Religion should not be regarded as one science among many, the inculcation of- which is a part of good education, but it must be the vital principle diffusing itself through all instruction, all rules, all authority, all discipline, all example. At what age is it proper, it may be asked, to begin teaching children religion? Their father and mother are, if true and consistent Christians, religion embodied and alive. And as soon as they begin to know their parents, they begin to know something about religion. A very young child is quite aware that his parents speak to Ong whom they do not see, and inquiring thoughts are awakened in his mind, before he can express them in words,*

And now, then, to sum.up all, consider a mother’s charge — an immortal creature; a mother’s duty — to train him up for God, heaven, and eternity; a mother’s dignity — to educate the family of the Almighty Creator of the universe; a mother’s diffi-

* Some of these maxims are taken from a work of the late Mrs. Copley, published by the Tract Society, and entitled, “The Young Mother; or, Affectionate Advice to an Unmarried Daughter.” A work’ which is most earnestly recommended to all young mothers, or who have the prospect of becoming such, as containing more sound, practical, and valuable advice on the physical, intellectual, and moral training of young children, than any book I am acqueinte with. ° culty — to train a fallen, sinful creature to holiness and virtue; a mother’s privilege — the promise of Divine grace to assist her in her momentous duties; a mother’s relief — to bear the burden of her cares to God in prayer; and a mother’s hope — to meet her child in glory everlasting, and spend eternal ages of delight with him before the throne of God and the Lamb.

But are mothers only to engage in this work of educating their children for God? No. Fathers, I speak to you, for the Bible speaks to you: “Ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath; but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.” 1 have addressed this sermon to your wives, because on them first devolves the duty of training the infant mind; not, however, to exonerate you from, but to engage them in this blessed work, and prepare the children for your hands, Not that they will ever, or should ever, give up their assiduities or withdraw their influence. No. A mother’s power is, perhaps, as great when judiciously exerted over the adult, as over the infant child. But you, when the children are growing up, must join your solicitude and labors with hers, They are your children as well as hers. God will require their souls at your hands as well as hers, Are you exercising your authority, giving your instructions, pouring out your prayers, affording your example, for the salvation of your children? Is it your wish, your ambition, your endeavor, your supplication, that they may be religious men, or only rich ones?

Are you pouring your influence into the same channel as your holy wife? Are you helping or hinder. ing her in her pious solicitude for the spiritual and eternal welfare of your joint offspring? Happy, happy couple! where there is sympathy of feeling, and similarity of sentiment in the most momentous concern that can engage the attention of man, of angels, or of God — religion. Where the husband and the wife are of one mind and one heart, not only in reference to themselves, but in regard also to their children, and both are engaged in training them up for everlasting glory; I can liken such a couple, in their benevolent efforts for their children’s welfare, only to the two angels who were sent down from heaven to the rescue of Lot, and who, with holy and beneficent violence, took him by the hand to pluck him from the burning city, and conducted him to the place of safety prepared by the mercy of Almighty God. 35