Mary Wesley (Mrs. Whitelamb)

Mary Wesley stands the third on the list of the grown up children of the Rev. Samuel Wesley. Through affliction, and probably some mismanagement in her nurse, she became considerably deformed in her body; and her growth in consequence was much stinted, and her health injured: but all written and oral testimony concurs in the statement that her face was exquisitely beautiful, and was a fair and very legible index to a mind and disposition almost angelic. Her humble, obliging, even, and amiable disposition made her the favourite and delight of the whole family. Mr. John and Mr. Charles Wesley frequently spoke of her, and ever with the most tender respect; and her sister Hetty, no mean judge of character, with whom she was an especial favourite, spoke and wrote of her as one of the most exalted of human characters.

She married, with the high approbation of all the family, Mr, John Whitelamb, of whom some mention has already been made, and whose history it is necessary to pursue a little farther. He was the son of parents at that time in very low circumstances, and was put to a charity school at Wroote, superintended by the Rev. John Romley; of whom it is worthy of remark, that in the course of a very few ?nonths, under the direction of the Rev. S. Wesley, Sen. he learned to read, write, and speak the Greek Language with facility and considerable elegance.

I have these particulars in a Greek Epistle to Mr. Charles Wesley, now lying before me, written in the year 1732. Mr. Romley studied Divinity under S. Wesley, Sen.; graduated at Lincoln College, Oxibrd; and was for a time the Curate of Mr. S. Wesley, (I believe at Wroote,) who had given him the first part of his education, and to whom he was for some time Amanuensis. He was a member of the Gentleman’s Society at Spalding; and in 1730 presented to that Society an “Account of the Manors, Villages, Seats, and Church of Althorp, in Lincolnshire.” This Society was founded at Spalding, in Lincolnshire, in the year 1710, by Maurice Johnson, Esq., of the Inner Temple.

Of this Society Mr. Samuel Wesley, Sen. became a member, January 9, 1723; and his son Samuel was elected a member September 18, 1729- — -See the History of it in Nichoi’s Literary Anecdotes, Vol. VI.

It is likely that Mr. Romley recommended young Whitelamb to Mr. Wesley’s notice, as a lad of promising abilities; for we find that Mr. Wesley took him to his house; that he became his Amanuensis in the place of Mr. Romley; designed the plates for Mr. Wesley’s Dissertations on the Book of Job; and engraved several of them with his own hand.

Under the care of the Rector of Epworth, he obtained a sufficient knowledge of Latin and Greek to enter the University; and at the expense, chiefly, of Mr. Wesley’s family, then indeed in very low circumstances, he w as maintained at Lincoln College, Oxford, where he obtained his education gratis under Mr. John Wesley, then a Fellow of that Collage. In the preceding Memoirs we have met with this young man frequently; especially in the Letters of the Rector of Epworth, and of Mrs. Wesley.

He suffered great privations in order to acquire a sufficiency of learning to pass through the university, and obtain orders. It is in reference to this, that Mrs. Wesley calls him “poor starveling Johnny.” So low were his circumstances that he could not procure himself clothes, and could not purchase a goicn when ordained. In every respect the Wesley family divided with him according to their power; and by his humble and upright conduct, he did honour to himself, and repaid their kindness. When he got orders, Mr. Wesley made him his Curate in Wroote; and having engaged Miss Mary Wesley’s affections, they were married, and Mr. Wesley gave up to him the living of Wroote, which he petitioned the Lord Chancellor to confirm; as that living, as well as Epivorth, was in the gift of the Crown; and he was promoted to it by the Chancellor on Feb. 9, 1734. See the Petition to the Chancellor, and the high character given of this young man, in the Life of the Rector of Ep< ^vortk But it appears that he afterwards swerved from the simplicity of the Gospel, fell into doubts concerning the truth of Divine Revelation, and at last became a Deist! I find no particulars of his reconversion: but that it did take place I infer from a note by Mr. John Wesley, on a Letter of his printed in the first Volume of the Arminian Magazine, containing the following passage: “To be frank, I cannot but look upon your doctrines as of ill consequence. Consequence I say; for, take them nakedly in themselves, nothing seems more innocent, nay good and holy. Suppose we grant that in you and the rest of the leaders, who are men of sense and discernment, what is called the seal and testimony of the Spirit is something real; yet I have great reason to think, that in the generality of your followers it is merely the effect of a heated imagination.” — Sept. 2, 1742. The note is, “No wonder he should think so; for at that time, and for some years after, he did not believe the Christian Revelation.” From which it appears, that some years after he was brought back to the Christian faith. Mr. Southey seems to doubt of his ever having been a Deist: but surely Mr. Wesley’s testimony is sufficient on this point, to whom, Mr. Whitelamb says, he had opened his ichole mind.

Mr. Wesley knew him to have been a Deist, though in other respects an amiable man; and he produced his Deism as the reason. and at the same time an excuse, for his believing that all pretensions to experimental religion were the effect of a heated imagination.

Mr. Romley was not so mindful of his obligations to the Wesley family. On September 6, 1742, when Mr. Wesley visited Epworth, he offered to assist Mr. Romley, who was then Curate, by either preaching or reading prayers: but the gentleman refused to let him do either, and went immediately and preached a Sermon against Enthusiasm! In the evening; Mr. Wesley preached in the churchyard, standing on the tomb of his Father. Mr. Whitelamb was in the congregation, and wrote to him the following Letter a few days after; which, because it is so creditable to his feelings, and to the sense he still retained of the many favours which he had received from him and from his family, I shall insert.

“June 11, 1742.

a Dear Brother,

a I saw you at Epworth on Tuesday Evening. Fain would I have spoken to you, but that I am quite at a loss to know how to address or behave.

“Your way of thinking is so extraordinary that your presence creates an awe, as if you were an inhabitant of another world. God grant you and your followers may always have entire liberty of conscience. — Will not you allow others the same?

“Indeed I cannot think as you do, any more than I can help honouring and loving you. Dear Sir, will you credit me? — I retain the highest veneration and affection for you. The sight of you moves me strangely. My heart overflows with gratitude: I feel in a higher degree all that tenderness and yearning of bowels, with which I am affected towards every branch of Mr. Wesley’s family. I cannot refrain from tears when I reflect, — this is the man, who at Oxford was more than a father to me; this is he whom I have heard expound, or dispute publicly, or preach at St. Mary’s, with such applause; — and, O that I should ever add, whom I have lately heard preach at Epworth! (on his Father’s tombstone.)

“I am quite forgot None of the family every honour me with a line! Have I been ungrateful? I appeal to Sister Patty, I appeal to Mr. Ellison, whether I have or no. I have been passionate, fickle, a fool: but I hope 1 shall never be ungrateful.

u Dear Sir, is it in my power to serve or oblige you any way? Glad I should be that you would make use of me. God open alL our eyes, and lead us into truth wherever it be!

John Whitelamb.”

His wife Mary did not long survive her marriage. She died in child-bed of her first child. How all the family could quite have forgotten Mr. Whitelamb I cannot tell. There must have been something improper in his conduct: indeed he seems to hint at this in the above Letter, “I have been passionate, fickle, a fool;” — and in one of the 2nd Sept. in the -same year, 1742, to Charles, he writes, “J. Whitelamb was never either ungrateful, or vicious; though by the heat of youthful blood, and want of experience in the world, he has been betrayed into very great follies” — The Mr. Ellison mentioned above was the husband of Susanna Wesley; and Patty was Mrs. Hall, both of whom will be mentioned in their proper places.

That Mr. Wesley still felt a parental affection and anxiety for his old pupil Mr. Whitelamb, and especially in reference to his eternal interests, will appear from the following Extract of one of his Letters to Mrs. Woodhouse of Epworth, in answer to one which that lady had written giving an account of Mr. Whitelamb’s death.

“Oct. 4, 1769.

“How long is it since Mr. Whitelamb died? What

disease did he die of? Did he lie ill for any time? Do you know any circumstances preceding or attending his death? O, why did he not die forty years ago, while he knew in whom he had believed Unsearchable are the counsels of God, and his ways past finding out,

John Wesley.”

The Whitelamb family have been long very respectable in Lincolnshire, and particularly at Wroote, where one of them succeeded to the pastoral charge in that parish; and was remarkable for his various learning, and especially for his great skill in mathematics.

As for the husband of Miss Mary Wesley, we may charitably hope from his sound education, and his long tried piety, that whatever doubts might for a time have obscured his views of the Sacred Records, and paralysed his religious feelings and experience, his former principles regained their influence and ascendency, and that he died in the faith of our Lord Jesus Christ.

The Verses to Mrs. Whitelamb’s Memory, with her Epitaph, composed by her sister Wright, I think it proper to subjoin; from which we learn that she was a most steady and affectionate friend; was deeply devoted to God; full of humility and goodness; and diligent in all the duties of life.

But she was a W esley; and in that singular family excellencies of all kinds were to be found, and the female part were as conspicu= ous as the male.

In the following Lines, which are full of mind and feeling, we shall find allusion to the source whence the miseries of Mrs. Wright’s Life proceeded. These will be considered at large in the account of

herself.

TO

THE MEMORY

OF

MRS. MARY WHITELAMB.

[By her Sister Mrs. Wright.]

If blissful spirits condescend to know,

And hover round what once they loved below;

Maria! gentlest excellence! attend

To her, who glories to have called thee friend!

Remote in merit, tho’ allied in blood,

Unworthy I, and thou divinely good!

Accept, blest shade, from me these artless lays,

Who never could unjustly blame, or praise.

How thy ceconomy and sense outweighed

The finest wit in utmost pomp display’d,
Let others sing, while I attempt to paint.
The godlike virtues of the friend and saint.

With business and devotion never cloy’d,
No moment of thy life pass’d unemployed,
Well-natured mirth, matured discretion joined, 15
Constant attendants of the virtuous mind.
From earliest dawn of youth, in thee well known,
The saint sublime and finished Christian shone.
Yet would not grace one grain of pride allow,
Or cry, “Stand off, I’m holier than thou.” 20
A worth so singular since time began,
But one surpassed, and He was more than man.
When deep immers’d in griefs beyond redress,
And friends and kindred heightened my distress,
And with relentless efforts made me prove 25
Pain, grief, despair, and wedlock without love;
My soft Maria could alone dissent,
O’erlook’d the fatal vow, and mounrd the punishment!
Condoled the ill, admitting no relief,

With such infinitude of pitying grief, 30

That all who could not my demerit see,

Mistook her wond’rous love for worth in me;

No toil, reproach, or sickness could divide

The tender mourner from her Stella’s side;

My fierce inquietude, and madd’ning care,. 35

Skilful to soothe, or resolute to share!

Ah me! that heaven has from this bosom tore
My angel friend, to meet on earth no more;,
That this indulgent spirit soars away,

Leaves but a still insentient mass of clay; 40
E’er Stella could discharge the smallest part
Of all she owed to such immense desert;
Or could repay with ought but feeble praise
The sole companion of her joyless days!

Nor was thy form unfair, tho’ heaven confined 45

To scanty limits thy exalted mind.

Witness thy brow serene, benignant, clear,

That none could doubt transcendent truth dwelt there;

Witness the taintless whiteness of thy skin,

Pure emblem of the purer soul within: 50

That soul, which tender, unassuming, mild,

Through jetty eyes with tranquil sweetness smil’d

But, ah! could fancy paint, or language speak,

The roseate beauties of thy lip or cheek,

Where Nature’s pencil, leaving art no room, 55

Touch ‘d to a miracle the vernal bloom.

(Lost tuough thou art) in Stella’s deathless line.

■Thy face immortal as thy fame should shine
To soundest prudence (life’s unerring guide)
To love sincere, religion without pride: 60
To friendship perfect in a female mind
Which I nor hope, nor wish, on earth to find:
To mirth, (the balm of care) from lightness free,
Unblemish’d faith, unwearied industry.

To every charm and grace combin’d in you, 65
Sister, and Friend! — a long, a last adieu!

MR. JOHN WESLEY’S ALTERATIONS.

Line 1. Happy spirits are allowed — Blissful spirits condescend.
Line 6. Tho worthless I. — Unworthy I.
Line 7. Dear — Blest.
Line 8. Durst. — Could.

Sixteen Lines are entirely left out, beginning — From earliest dawn Lines 31, 32, 35, and 36, are entirely left out. Line 37. Torn. — Tore.

Line 38. The dearest friend whom I must ever mourn.
Lines 39, 40. Left out.

Line 45. Pleasing thy face and form. — Nor was thy form unfair

Line 46. Extensive. — Exalted.

Line 49. Lustre — Whiteness.

Line 50. Bright, brighter — Pure, Purer.

Line 51. Easy and affected. — Tender, unassuming.

Line 52. Cheerful. — Tranquil.

The four next lines are left out, beginning, But ah! could fancy paint. Line 60. Void of — Without.

Line 62. Which I can never hope again. — Nor hope, nor wish on earth Line 64. To stedfast truth. — Unblemish’d faith. Line 66. Long arid last adieu.

A copy of these verses was published in the Gentleman’s Magazine for Dec. 1736, Vol. VI. p. 740, with the following Inscription: “To the Memory of Mrs. Mary Whitelamb, Daughter of the late Rev. Mr. Wesley, Rector of Epworth and Wroote.” From it I have recovered a few stanzas omitted in the MS.; otherwise it is very imperfect.

EPITAPH

ON

MRS. MARY WHITELAMB,

[By her Sister Mrs. Wright.]

If highest worth in beauty’s bloom,
Exempted mortals from the Tomb;
We had not round this sacred Bier
Mourned the sweet Babe and Mother here.
Where innocence from harm is ble3t,
And the meek sufferer is at rest!

Fierce pangs she bore without complaint,
Till Heaven relieved the finished Saint.

If savage bosoms felt her woe,
(Who lived and died without a foe,)
How should I mourn, or how commend,
My teuderest, dearest, firmest friend?
Most pious, meek, resign’d and chaste,
With every social virtue graced!

If, Reader, thou wouldst prove, and know.
The ease she found not here below;
Her bright example points the way
To perfect bliss, and endless day.

I have not been able to recover any thing written either in prose or verse by Mrs. Whitelamb; and without this short and imperfect Memoir, her name would have been soon consigned to oblivion.