The Difficulty of Knowing Our Faults

Who can understand his errors Cleanse thou me from secret faults. — Psa, xix. 12.

The truths of the Bible are exactly suited to the mind of man. As soon as he begins seriously to read or hear the word, he experiences its penetrating power. The conscience feels its operation as certainly as the eye perceives the light, or the ear the sound. And as men would know nothing of the appearance of the objects by which they are surrounded, until the light shines upon them, so the soul remains ignorant, in a great degree, of what is in it, until the word of God enters, and enlightens the chamber within. “The entrance of thy word giveth light.” “The commandment of the Lord is pure, enlightening the eyes.”

A small portion of light, it is said, only serves to

render darkness more visible; so, when the light of

truth begins to penetrate the mind, it shows that

there is within us a dark abyss; and every additional ray discovers more of the intricate windings of the human heart; for there is not only dense darkness, but many false and deceitful appearances which turn out, upon accurate investigation, very different from what they ‘seemed to be. It was some such view as this which caused the royal Psalmist to exclaim, “Who can understand his errors? Cleanse thou me from secret faults.” In the sequel of the discourse, I propose

I. To inquire why it is so difficult to know our own faults.

II. To consider the import of the prayer here uttered.

In the holy Scriptures errors and sins signify the same thing. The very word which commonly is used to express the idea of sin, in both the original languages, literally signifies to miss a mark. It is a deviation from a right line. A law is represented as a straight line, every crook, or departure from which is sin. “Sin is a transgression of the law.” Therefore, “by the law is the knowledge of sin.” All sin arises from some error or deception of the mind; for it is contrary to the constitutional principles of a rational nature to choose evil as evil. Every choice is necessarily of something which, for the present, has assumed the appearance of good, that is, something agreeable; but sin is intrinsically and wholly evil; and, therefore, in order to be chosen, there must be some deception in regard to it. This might be forcibly illustrated by considering the circumstances of the first sin of man. But every one may be convinced that this is true by referring to his own experience, and recalling to memory the particular exercises of his mind when induced to commit sin.

At any rate, in our text, the word “errors” means sins, for all will admit, that what the Psalmist prays to be cleansed from is sin, but in the original there is no other word to stand for sins; the word faults being supplied by the translators.

I. What I have proposed is, to assign some reasons for the difficulty, here implied, in knowing our sins. And it will be proper before going further, to make a distinction between knowing that a particular act is a sin, and perceiving the turpitude or moral evil that is in that act. The true evil of sin can only be known to those who are spiritually enlightened.

1. The first reason which may be assigned for our knowing so little of ourselves is, that few acquire the habit of reflection. It is natural and easy to think on things without, which are the objects of our senses; but to turn our mind in on itself and its operations, requires a painful effort; especially at first. It seems to be an unnatural state of mind, and a running against the natural current of our thoughts. On this account, the number who have acquired the habit of looking within is small.

2. Another cause of difficulty in obtaining the knowledge of our inner man is the fugitive nature of our thoughts, and the ever varying state of our emotions. Indeed, the very effort to inspect these mental exercises changes their nature, so that they are not the same as they were the moment before this effort was commenced.

3. There is in the human mind so great a mingling of different and even opposite feelings, that it is hard to separate things so blended together, and more difficult to ascertain the moral character of every emotion or desire. While some exercises of mind are morally good, and others morally evil, there is a large class which have no moral quality. They are merely natural or constitutional feelings; such as may exist in creatures which have no moral sense, and which are actually found in the inferior animals. But in man, as a moral agent, these animal feelings require to be restrained, directed, and governed; and when this is neglected, or improperly performed, these same feelings, which, considered abstractly, have no moral quality, become an important part of man’s moral character. Much of sin consists in the irregularity and excess’ of these constitutional propensities; and much of virtue in their proper government.

Now, to discriminate between all the variety of emotions and exercises of our minds, and to form a correct estimate of the good and the evil, and to separate these from such as have no moral character, and to ascertain the degree of good or evil in any particular state of mind, is not an easy task.

4. There is another constantly operative cause which prevents men from knowing their own errors. It is that false medium which pride and self-love produce, and through which their sins are either not perceived at all, or are not seen in their true colour and dimensions. Every one has observed how strangely self-conceit blinds the minds of men. And pride itself is nothing else but an erroneous estimate of ourselves: it is attributing to ourselves what does not belong to us, or forming too high an opinion of the worth of what we do possess. And as it magnifies our virtues, so it diminishes our faults; and thus men practise, habitually, upon themselves a grand deception; thinking themselves to be something, when, in the sight of God, they are nothing. This deception they carry with them into religion, where its consequences are more injurious than any where else. “They justify themselves, and despise others.” The language of their hearts is, “Stand by thyself; I am holier than thou.” Whole churches, like that of Laodicea, under this delusion of spiritual pride, are found to boast, “We are rich and increased with goods, and have need of nothing; and know not that they are poor and wretched, and miserable, and blind, and naked.” The Pharisee described by our Lord, who came up to the temple to pray, boasted of his moral and religious duties, but he made confession of no sin whatever.

This blindness, the effect of pride and self-love, is as common now as ever. Even among those educated under the light of the gospel, it is most manifest. Men will, indeed, acknowledge in the general that they are sinners; but when you come to particulars, they are prone to justify themselves in almost every thing. Even the wickedest boast that their hearts are good. Men may have been taught the doctrine of total depravity, but they’ are not convinced of it as a practical truth in relation to themselves. The pride of their heart blinds their eyes.

5. There is another consideration, closely allied to the last, which has a powerful tendency to prevent us from knowing our own sins. The discovery of sin produces remorse, which is not only a painful feeling, but a more intolerable pain than any of which the human soul is susceptible, as far as our experience goes. And a sight and sense of sin not only produces remorse, but “a fearful looking for of judgment and fiery indignation.” Men naturally avert their eyes from objects which are sure to excite painful feelings. This is one great reason why so many persons neglect the Bible, and never seriously look into their own hearts. It is the constant effort of their lives to keep out the light of divine truth from their minds. The bustle of business, or the round of amusements is kept up to free the mind from the intrusion of unwelcome thoughts, relating to God and to eternity. And if the secret motives which lead to the adoption of soul-destroying error were scrutinized, it would be found that the desire to escape from the uneasy feelings which the truth produces in the mind, has had a chief influence in rendering infidelity, or fundamental error, acceptable to the mind. “Men love darkness rather than light, because their deeds are evil.” And when men deliberately reject the truth, they are often abandoned to believe a lie, as a judgment for not loving to retain God in their knowledge.

6. Another cause of erroneous notions respecting our own character is, the habit of looking at ourselves through the medium of the flatteries and praises of others. When persons are in exalted stations, or called to the performance of public duties, they often excite the admiration of their fellow-men, especially of those who are below them, and, of course, their ears are filled with the commendation of their admirers. Others who wish to gain the favour of their fellow-men make use of base flattery, extolling them for virtues and talents which they do not believe they possess. Now, though a person may be conscious that he does not deserve these praises, yet such is the infatuating influence of self-love, that he is gratified that others entertain so high an opinion of him; and at length he begins to conceit that the qualities ascribed to him by his admirers and flatterers do really belong to his character. This is often clearly manifested when the man is thrown upon his own defence. He then appeals to public opinion, and seems to regard that as the true standard by which his character should be estimated. He comes at length actually to view himself through the medium of other men’s opinions.

7. Another reason why men so commonly remain ignorant of themselves is, that they get into the habit of comparing themselves with others around them; and because they observe many addicted to crimes of which they are not guilty, they draw the conclusion that they are better than most; and adopt the opinion that their faults are trivial, and their characters uncommonly excellent. The apostle Paul notices and rebukes this fallacious method of judging. “For,” says he, “we dare not make ourselves of the number, or compare ourselves with some that commend themselves; but they measuring themselves by themselves, and comparing, themselves among themselves, are not wise.” We are very incompetent judges of the real moral character of others. God only knows how to estimate the true character of man. That often which is highly esteemed by men is an abomination in his sight, and whatever others may be, whether better or worse than ourselves, it alters not our character. This remains the same as if no other sinner was in existence.

8. Finally, on this head, the great source of error is not knowing, or not applying to ourselves, the true standard of rectitude. “By the law is the knowledge of sin.” Of the extent of the demands of this law, and of the spiritual nature of the obedience which it requires many remain ignorant; or if they theoretically understand the nature of the precepts of the law, they do not apply this standard to their own hearts and lives. This was Paul’s case before his conversion; for he says, “I was alive without the law once.” In this state of ignorance and carelessness, men remain until the Spirit of God convinces them of sin by the application of the law to the conscience: when new light breaks in upon them, and they who before thought their sins were few and venial, now behold them rising up in dreadful array, an exceeding great multitude and very heinous in their nature. Then the convinced sinner is made to cry out, “Who can understand his errors? Cleanse thou me from secret fa jits.”

Some of the sins of the heart may have taken deep root, and may exist in great force, and yet may not lead to external acts which are manifestly criminal. In such cases the moral turpitude of the mental disposition is often unnoticed; and when such sins have been habitually indulged, constant familiarity with them blinds the mind in regard to their evil.

Thus avarice, pride, envy, and ambition may have predominant influence in the mind, and yet the person under their dominion may, from prudential and selfish considerations, avoid external acts of enormity, and conform externally to the rules of justice and morality. Such are esteemed to be moral men, and maintain a good character in the sight of men. Being restrained from open transgression, they are very apt to entertain a high opinion of their own goodness; and at any rate to remain ignorant of the depraved state of their hearts, which are uniformly under the influence of such affections and principles as the law of God condemns.

If the hearts of many, who boast of their morality, were laid open to public view, how much abominable impurity and iniquity would be seen, even in those who wear externally the garb of modesty and decency!

1. If it be so difficult to know the moral state of our own hearts, we should be led to a more constant watchfulness over our own thoughts and feelings. We should also be in the habit of daily self-examination. And as we cannot judge correctly without having in our minds the true standard to which we ought to be conformed, we must become intimately acquainted with the word of God. We should be careful to adopt just ideas of the spiritual character of the law, and to view it as extending to the thoughts — to the tempers — to the desires and emotions, and to the most secret motives of our conduct, and to sins of omission as well as of commission.

2. Knowing the treachery of the heart, and the many hindrances which stand in the way of acquiring a knowledge of our sins, we should incessantly and importunately pray to God who alone possesses a perfect knowledge of the heart to search and try us, and see whether any wicked disposition is yet indulged; and so to convince us of our sins, that we may be brought to that state of contrition and humility, which is the temper and state most becoming such imperfect creatures.

II. We come now, in the second place, to consider the import of the prayer here uttered. The prayer is for deliverance, not only from known sins, but also from such as were hidden. There are two kinds of cleansing or purification; the one is from guilt by expiation; the second from inherent pollution by sanctification. As sin is condemned by the law of God, and conscience, as far as it is informed, is an echo of the law, every sinner convinced of his sin must feel a sense of guilt, or which is the same thing, a sentence of condemnation within himself. This burden he can by no means remove, by any acts of new obedience, or by any voluntary sufferings to which he may submit. Rivers of waters may run down his cheeks, but sorrow for his sins cannot cleanse him from the deep stain which sin has left behind it. He may possibly forget that he is lying under a sentence of condemnation. He may even persuade himself that the fact is not so; that the idea of his obligation to obey the law is a mere fiction. Or he may adopt the opinion that pardon is easily obtained, and, therefore, he need give himself no concern about the penalty of the divine law. But all these false notions, being in direct opposition to the clearest dictates of his own conscience, are not accompanied with complete assurance; and he is still liable to be disturbed and alarmed by the voice of conscience; especially when overtaken by sickness, or some other calamity. Nothing can produce permanent peace of conscience but that which provides an atonement which will be a complete satisfaction to law and justice. On this account the conscience can be cleansed from guilt by nothing but the blood of Christ.

Here is the expiatory fountain in which the house of David and the inhabitants of Jerusalem may be washed from all their uncleanness. And such is the efficacy of this fountain of blood, that the greatest sinner may here be cleansed from all his guilt. The most heinous sins are perfectly cleansed by the application of the blood of Jesus. “His blood clean seth from all sin.” No greater sin can easily be conceived of than the murder of our Lord, but many involved in the guilt of this crime were pardoned on the day of Pentecost. And when the risen Saviour gave instructions to his apostles to preach repentance and remission of sins to all nations, they were directed to begin their ministry at Jerusalem. Paul reckons himself to be the chief of sinners; yet he was assured that he had found mercy. And in writing to the Corinthian converts, he gives a black catalogue of crimes, and says, “Such were some of you, but ye are washed, ye are sanctified, ye are justified in the name of the Lord Jesus, and by the Spirit of the Lord.”

There is. indeed, one sin which is declared unpardonable; but not, as we suppose, on account of any want of efficacy in the blood of Christ to remove its guilt, but because those guilty of it are never brought to repentance. This cleansing from guilt in Scripture is called justification; and this blessing is received no otherwise than by faith. This doctrine is most clearly set forth by Paul, in the following words: “Being justified freely by his grace through the redemption that is in Christ Jesus; whom God has set forth to be a propitiation through faith in his blood, to declare his righteousness for the remission of sins that are past, through the forbearance of God. To declare, I say, at this time his righteousness, that he might be just, and the justifier of him who believeth in Jesus.”

This blessing David most earnestly prayed for in the time of his deep penitence and humiliation, or account of his great sin in the case of Uriah. He cries, M Wash me throughly from mine iniquity, and cleanse me from my sin” — “Purge me with hyssop, and I shall be clean; wash me, and I shall be whiter than snow.”

As it is said, “Cursed is every one that continueth not in all things written in the book of the law to do them;” and as God has repeatedly declared, that he will render to every man according to his works, it is plain that the guilt of every man must be very great. And as many of our sins are secret, unknown to our fellow-men, and many hidden from our own view, the petition to be cleansed from such sins is one which it behoves every person continually to offer. Our sins are compared in number to the hairs of our head, and to the sand on the sea-shore, and there is not one of this great multitude which, if it should remain unpardoned, would not be sufficient to shut the soul out of heaven and sink it to hell. How great, then, is the need of pardon! How many are the sins both known and unknown, for which pardon must be received, or the sinner perish! Besides, every day we are committing sins which are prevented from bringing us again into condemnation by nothing else but the sprinkling of atoning blood. “Let us,” says Paul, “draw near with a true heart, in full assurance of faith, having our hearts sprinkled from an evil conscience, and our bodies washed with pure water.” Here we have the two identical blessings prayed for in the text, brought fully into view.

The cleansing for which the Psalmist so earnestly prayed, includes substantially all that the sinner needs in order to his salvation; all the rich blessings of the new covenant. If he is cleansed from guilt by the blood of sprinkling, and from pollution by the washing of regeneration and renewing of the Holy Ghost, there is nothing to hinder his entrance into heaven, and his enjoying the blessedness of that holy place. For those who are cleansed by the process which the gospel prescribes are free from every stain. Though their sins were as scarlet, they are made white as snow; though they were red like crimson, they are as wool. Christ, the great Purifier, will present them before his Father’s throne without spot or wrinkle, or any such thing. Certainly, then, our prayers for this double cleansing should be fervent and incessant. And unless we receive this cleansing of our souls from secret sins, and all manner of sin, our condition through eternity will be one of extreme misery and degradation. That burden of guilt which the forbearance of God alone keeps from crushing the impenitent sinner, will fall with all its dreadful weight on the gospel rejecter, and will sink him to the lowest hell. It will be more tolerable for Sodom and Gomorrah in the day of judgment, than for him. Let him, then, fly speedily from the wrath to come. Let him make his escape to the appointed house of refuge, where he will find shelter from every storm, and safety from every danger. Let him come near to the cross, and direct his eyes to the Saviour, lifted up for his salvation.

But the soul not only needs to be cleansed by the blood of Christ from the stain of guilt, but being internally polluted, must be washed with the washing of regeneration, and renewed by the renewing of the Holy Ghost. Pollution has defiled all the powers of the soul, and for this there is no remedy but in the “sanctification of the Spirit.” This cleansing is begun when the first ray of divine light is let in to the dark mind of the sinner. Before, he knew not the turpitude of his sins. Indeed, until this time, he took little notice of the moral state of his heart. If he could keep up a decent external behaviour, he was satisfied with himself.

But now his eye is turned inward, and the heart which he had often boasted to be pure, he finds to be corrupt, “deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked.” In his first concern, he hoped to be able to do something to cleanse himself. By prayers, by penances, and external reformation, many have, as it were, cleansed the outside of the cup and platter; but their inward part was still full of the pollution of sin. And even when the evil of the heart begins to be discerned, the whole depth of the evil is not seen. There are still many hidden iniquities, “secret faults,” which conceal themselves in the deep recesses and intricate windings of the deceitful heart. Sin often assumes the guise of virtue and innocence, or presents such palliations and excuses as seem to lessen its turpitude. The more spiritual light any man enjoys, the more sensible is he of the wickedness of his own heart. It may be compared to a dark chamber, full of abominations. Until light is let in these odious objects are not seen, but as soon as a single ray is darted in upon them, they begin to be seen in their deformity. While the light is partial, the whole will not be perceived; every new ray of light reveals something not before discovered. Thus it is with the renewed man: the further he advances in piety, the deeper is his sense of the want of purity in his heart. So far is he from entertaining the vain conceit that he is already perfect or approaching near perfection, that it is difficult for him to conclude that he is not, every day, growing worse. And it is on this account especially, that the pious are so often mistaken in regard to their real progress in piety. But the more we see of our own sinfulness, the more intense will be our desires for cleansing. Indeed, all spiritual exercises will bear an exact proportion to our sense of the “exceeding sinfulness of sin.” This conviction fills the soul with penitence, and humbles it in the dust before God; and at the same time drives it to the fountain opened for sin and uncleanness. Though the efficient power by which the soul is purified is the Holy Spirit, yet means are not on this account rendered superfluous. God works commonly by appropriate means, both in the world of nature and of grace. The word of God, or divine truth, is necessary in this operation. The rational soul to act right must have the knowledge of the truth, and God’s word contains the truth. If we hope for cleansing, we must look for it by means of the divine word. The intercessory prayer of our Saviour was, and no doubt still is, “sanctify them through thy truth, thy word is truth.” The ordinance of baptism is a visible representation of the purification of the soul. Therefore, it is said, “Except a man be born of water and the Spirit, he cannot enter into the kingdom of heaven.” The washing of the body in the baptismal water is, therefore, referred to when the internal cleansing of the soul is meant; as in the text already quoted, in which the double cleansing by blood and water is mentioned — “Having our hearts sprinkled from an evil conscience, and our bodies washed with pure water.” The connexion between the word and the sanctification of the soul is clearly manifest from the exhortation of Paul to the Corinthians:

11 Having, therefore, these promises, dearly beloved, let us cleanse ourselves from all filthiness of flesh and spirit, perfecting holiness in the fear of God.” And more clearly still in Ephes. v. 25, 26, “Even as Christ loved the church, and gave himself foi it, that he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word.” Peter also connects increase of holiness with the knowledge of the truth, when he says, “Grow in grace, and in the knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ.” The importance of prayer for the aids of the Holy Spirit is evident from the earnest petition in our text, and from many other similar prayers in the Psalms: “Wash me throughly from my iniquity, and cleanse me from my sin.” “Purge me with hyssop, and I shall be clean; wash me, and I shall be whiter than snow.”

In conclusion, it may be remarked,

1. That the best evidence of the existence of a holy nature, is the sincere and prevailing desire of perfect holiness. “Blessed are they that hunger and thirst after righteousness, for they shall be filled.” The love of holiness is the same as the love of the law. Says the royal Psalmist, “O how love I thy law.” “I esteem all thy precepts, concerning all things to be right, and hate every false way.” The language of Paul, and of every renewed heart is, “I delight in the law of God after the inner man.”

2. The evidence of a gracious state is not the persuasion that the object sought is fully attained, but an ardent, habitual desire to reach it. “Not as though I had already attained, or were already perfect,’’ says Paul; “but this one thing I do; forgetting those things which are behind, I press forward to those things which are before, for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus;” endeavouring, through the Spirit, “to mortify the deeds of the body,” and “to perfect holiness in the fear of God.”

3. When, on account of sin, the conscience is again burdened and wounded, recourse must be had to the same “blood of sprinkling” which afforded relief at first. No peace can be found any where else. Penances, and pilgrimages, and multiplied religious ceremonies and works can do nothing toward procuring true peace of conscience. Faith in Christ, a believing view of the cross, is the only remedy for guilt. “My little children,” says John, “sin not; but if any man sin, we have an Advocate with the Father, who is the propitiation for our sins, and not for ours only, but for the sins of the whole world.” Let the believer, then, learn to live near the cross, and often look by faith on the bleeding sacrifice of “the Lamb of God, which taketh away the sin of the world.”

4. We must not forget that many of our sins are hidden from ourselves. For these we should seek for pardon and purification. Though we cannot repent of these in detail, we can in the general. We can repent of the sin of our nature, commonly called original sin, from which all actual transgressions proceed. But it behoves us to be diligent and faithful in searching for our secret sins, that when discovered we may apply to the mercy of God for pardon and cleansing.

5. The neglect of secret sins often leads to the commission of presumptuous sins. By degrees the concealed poison gathers strength, until at last, on some favourable occasion, it exerts its power and breaks out into overt acts, and for a season, at least, gains dominion over the man. Such falls in professors open the mouths of the wicked, and give them occasion to blaspheme that holy religion which they profess.