In Time of Loneliness

Save on the Sea of Sorrows, when the night Was saddest on our heart. We followed him At other times in sunshine. Summer days And moonlight nights he led us over paths Bordered with pleasant flowers; but when his steps Were on the mighty waters, when we went With trembling hearts through nights of pain and loss His smile was sweeter, and his love more dear; And only heaven is better than to walk With Christ at midnight over moonless seas.”

Loneliness is one of the most pathetic of all human experiences. The yearning for companionship is one of the deepest of all yearnings. The religion of Christ has something to meet every human need; what is its blessing for loneliness? We may turn to the Master’s own life for answer to our question. He met all the experiences that ever become ours, and he found for himself the best there is to be found in the divine love to meet each experience. Thus he showed us what we may find in our times of need and how we may find it.

Christ’s loneliness was one of the most bitter elements of his earthly sorrow. All great men are solitary men, for there are so few others in whom they can find companionship. Christ was the greatest man who ever lived on the earth. His very greatness of character made it impossible for him to have any real companionship among men. Besides, those whom he came to bless and save, rejected him. “He came unto his own, and his own received him not.” The only human relief to his loneliness along the years of his public ministry was in the love of his chosen friends, and this was most imperfect and unsatisfactory.

But we know where he ever turned for solace and comfort in his experiences. After a day of pain and suffering he would climb the mountain and spend the night in communion with his Father, returning in the morning renewed and strong for another day of beautiful life. In his darkest hour he said that though left alone as to human companionship, he was not alone, because his Father was with him.

The comfort of our Lord’s heart in his loneliness is for us too if we are walking in his steps. We too have our experiences of loneliness in this world, and we too may have the blessed companionship that shall fill the emptiness. In a certain sense all life is lonely. Even with sympathetic companionships all about us, there is an inner life which each of us lives altogether alone. We must make our own choices and decisions. We must meet our own questions and answer them ourselves. We must fight our own battles, endure our own sorrows, carry our own burdens. Friendship may be very close and tender, but there is a sanctuary of each life into which even the holiest friendship may not enter.

“Still in each heart of hearts a hidden deep Lies, never fathomed by its dearest, best.”

Blessed are they who in loneliness can say, “Yet I am not alone, because the Father is with me.” God’s is the only friendship that can really meet all our soul’s deep needs and cravings. Human companionship helps us at a fewpoints; the divine has its blessing for every experience. We never shall be left alone when we have Christ. When other helpers fail and comforts flee, he will ever stand close beside us. When other faces fade out of view his will shine out with tender love, pouring its light upon us.

There are special experiences of loneliness in every life for which Christ is needed. Youth is one of these times. Youth seems happy and light-hearted. Companionships swarm all about it. But ofttimes a young person feels lonely even amid such scenes and friendships. All life is new to him. As his soul awakes a thousand questions arise demanding answer. He is in a world with a thousand paths, and he must choose in which he will walk. Everything is mysterious. There are perils lurking on all sides. Choices must be made. Lessons must be learned. All is new, and at every step the voice is heard, “You have not passed this way heretofore.” This loneliness of inexperience, when a young soul is taking its earliest steps in life, is one of the most trying and painful feelings of all the years. If Christ be not then the companion, lonely and perilous indeed is the way. But if he walks beside the young soul in its inexperience all is well.

There are those who are lonely because they are homeless. It is impossible to estimate too highly the value and the helpfulness of a true home of love. Home is a shelter. Young lives nest there and find warmth and protection. There is also guidance in a true Christian home. Many of life’s hardest questions are answered by a wise mother or father. Blessed is that young man or young woman who can take every perplexity, every mystery, every doubt or fear, every hunger, home to the sacredness of love’s sanctuary, and who gets there true sympathy, patient counsel, and wise guidance.

Home has also its blessed companionship. It is the one place where we are absolutely sure of each other and do not need to be on our guard. Youth has its unspeakable longings, its deep hungers, its cravings for tenderness. In the true home these are all met. Those who have such a home do not realize the half it is to them. It is the very shadow of Christ’s wings over their lives, the very cleft of the Rock, the very bosom of divine love. Life’s loneliness means far less to them while home shields them and blesses them with its companionships and its gentle, patient, wise, helpful, nourishing love.

But sometimes the home is pulled down over youth and its shelter broken up. Few things are sadder than homelessness. Loneliness begins to be really felt when the home is gone, when there is no longer a wise and loving mother to give her counsel in life’s inexperience, to lay her hand on the head in benediction, to listen to eager questions and answer them, to restrain the impetuous spirit, to quiet the soul when it is perturbed and when its peace is broken, to lead through perplexing paths, to fill the hungry heart with the comfort of love when it longs for sympathy and companionship. Bitter indeed is the sense of loneliness when a young person, used to all that a mother’s love means, turns away from a mother’s grave to miss thenceforward the blessings that have been so much in the past. Nothing earthly will in any full and adequate measure compensate for the loss. Other human friendships may be very sweet, but they will not give back home, with its shelter, its affection, its trust, its guidance, its soothing, its security.

Only less lonely is it for the young people whom circumstances take away in early years from the home where through childhood their life has been gently nourished. The home still stands, and the love is still there with all its blessed warmth, and letters can be sent and received, and now and then there can be a return for a brief stay in the sacred shelter. This mitigates the loss and the loneliness; yet even this experience is ofttimes a very sad one. Away from home there is always a loss not of love only, but also of protection. The young people who leave quiet rural homes for life in the midst of a great city, plunge into perils from which only Christ can shield them.

But blessed is that life which in any earthly homelessness can say, “Yet I am not alone, because Christ is with me.” Blessed is that loneliness or homelessness which has Christ to fill the emptiness. With Christ unseen yet loved and made real to the heart by love and faith, even a room in a boarding-house may become a home, a sanctuary of peace, a shelter of divine love.

Another time of special loneliness is when sorrow strips off the sweet friendships of life. Old age is an illustration. Old people are ofttimes very lonely. Once they were the centre of groups of friends and companions who clustered about them. But the years brought their changes. Now the old man stands alone. Still the streets are full; but where are the faces of forty, fifty years ago? There is a memory of vacant chairs, of marriage altars with the unbindings and the separations that followed. The old faces are gone. It is young life that now fills the home, the street, the church, and the old people are lonely because their old friends are gone.

Yet in Christ even old age can say, “I am not alone.” No changes in life can take him away. He is the companion of life’s feebleness. He loves the old people. There is a special promise for them: “Even to old age I am he, and even to hoar hairs will I carry you.” Christian old age is very near to glory. It will not be long till the old people reach home to stand again amid the circle of loved ones who blessed their youth and early years.

“So long thy power has blest me, sure it still Will lead me on O’er moor and fen, o’er crag and torrent, till

The night is gone, And with the morn those angel faces smile Which I have loved long since, and lost awhile.”

But not the old people only are left lonely by life’s changes; sorrow touches all ages, and if we have not Christ when other friends are taken, desolate indeed shall we be. Blessed is that life, any life, which, when human friends are taken away, finds the friendship of Christ all-filling, all-satisfying, and can say, “Yet I am not alone, for Christ is with me.”

The loneliest of all human experiences is that of dying. We cannot die in clusters, not even two and two; we must die alone. Human hands must unclasp ours as we enter the valley of shadows. Human faces must fade from our vision as we pass into the mists. “I cannot see you,” said one dying, as the loved ones stood about his bed. So it will be with each one of us in turn. Human love cannot go beyond the edge of the valley. But we need not be alone even in the deepest of all loneliness, for if we are Christ’s we can say, “Yet I am not alone, for my Saviour is with me.” When human hands unclasp, his will clasp ours the more firmly. When human loved faces fade out, his will shine above us in all its glorious brightness. When we must creep out of the bosom of human affection, it will be only into the clasp of the everlasting arms, into the bosom of Christ. Death’s loneliness will thus be filled with divine companionship.

The inference from all this is our absolute need of the friendship and companionship of Christ, without which we can only sink away into life’s loneliness and perish. One reason, no doubt, why our lives are so full of experiences of need, is that we may learn to walk with Christ. If earth’s human companionships satisfied us, and if we never lost them, we might not care for Christ’s. If earth’s homes were perfect, and if they never crumbled, we might not grow homesick for heaven.

“There is a mystery in human hearts; And though we be encircled by a host Of those who love us well and are beloved, To every one of us from time to time There comes a sense of utter loneliness. Our dearest friend is ’ stranger ’ to our joy, And cannot realize our bitterness. * There is not one who really understands, — Not one to enter into all I feel; ‘Such is the cry of each of us in turn. We wander in a ’ solitary way,’ No matter what or where our lot may be; Each heart, mysterious even to itself, Must live its inner life in solitude.

And would you know the reason why this is?

It is because the Lord desires our love.

In every heart he wishes to be first;

He therefore keeps the secret key himself,

To open all its chambers, and to bless

With perfect sympathy and holy peace

Each solitary soul that comes to him.

So, when we feel this loneliness, it is

The voice of Jesus, saying, ‘Come to me; ’

And every time we are ’ not understood,1

It is a call for us to come again,

For Christ alone can satisfy the soul;

And those who walk with him from day to day

Can never have a * solitary way.’

And when beneath some heavy cross you faint And say, * I cannot bear this load alone,’ You say the truth. Christ made it purposely So heavy that you must return to him. The bitter grief which 4 no one understands,’ Conveys a secret message from the King, Entreating you to come to him again. The Man of Sorrows understands it well; In all points tempted, he can feel with you. You cannot come too often or too near. The Son of God is infinite in grace; His presence satisfies the longing soul; And those who walk with him from day to day Can never have a ’ solitary way.’”