Domestic History
It is said of God that He setteth the solitary in families. I have Autobioabundant cause for thankfulness for the manner in which
ai:)peared for me in this momentous matter He chose
better for me than I should have chosen for myself. There is a great fault in our students in forming hasty and often injudicious attachments. Those generally do best who hold their affections in control till they have finished their studies and have entered upon their ministry. The cause of failure to many of oiu’ ministers may be found in their hasty and ill-formed matches.
When I first settled in Birmingham I came on a visit to a Mr Frears, one of the leading members of the church, an American merchant, and a man of nmch real worth. His wife was a Scotch lady, of great strength of mind and real piety. I was received as one of the family, and treated as a son. As no suitable place was found for my lodgings, I remained in that family month after month, and acquired an attachment to them of no ordinary strength. My feelings for Mrs Frears were truly filial, and I think I never loved any man at that time out of the circle of my own friends as I loved Mr Frears. When a situation was at length found for me, and the lodgings were actually engaged, we all felt so much when the time for separation arrived, that my dear friends invited me to remain where I was till I should remove
LIFE OF JOHN ANGELL JAMES.
Antobio- to a house of my own, of which there was then some prospect at
graphical.,
no very remote period.
Among my congregation were two sisters of the name of Smith, — Mary and Frances Charlotte. They were the daughters of Dr Smith, a respectable physician of the town, lately deceased. Their father, before his death, had furnished for them, in prospect of his departure, a house, only two doors below that in which Mr Frears lived. I was thus thrown into the company of these ladies, especially by meeting them at Mrs Walford’s, an aged, pious, and most intelligent woman, and an intimate friend fii-st of Dr Smith, — who wished to marry her, — and then of his daughters. Mrs Walford lived exactly opposite the house occupied by the ladies. My attention was soon directed to Fanny, the youngest. I had been one day most earnestly praying for Divine direction in this important step, and during prayer Frances Smith occurred with such force to my mind, that I considered it an indication of Providence that my attention should be directed to her — to which I was encouraged by Mrs Walford, her intimate friend; and on December 2, 1 805, I made known to her my attachment, and my wishes to obtain her hand and heart. I was accepted. As she was living in her own house, there was no need of long delay, and on the 7th of July the following year we were married at the parish church of Edgbaston. So that I had only to remove from my kind friend, Mr Frears’, to the next door but one, where was everything made ready to my hand.
An incident occurred on the day of our marriage which might have terminated our connexion as soon as it was formed. On the road to Worcester, through which we had to pass on our way into Dorsetshire, we were overtaken by a tremendous thunderstorm accompanied with hail. The postilion drove us under a high elm tree for shelter. Aware of our danger in such a situation, I ordered him to proceed, but as the storm increased he again took shelter under another tree, and, upon being remonstrated with, he declared that the hail was so heavy, that neither he nor the horses could stand under it, and that be the consequences what they might, he must have the covering of the boughs for a protection. It was an awful moment; the thunder was rolling, the light- Autobioning flashing, and the hail, notwithstanding the protection Qf^P^”^ the tree, fell so heavy that it seemed as if the roof of the chaise would be beaten in. We had scarcely courage to utter a word, but sat in sUence, not knowing but the next flash might sever the knot which only a few hours before had been tied. However, by God’s good providence we were presei-ved from all harm, and proceeded on our way very glad and grateful for the deliverance we had experienced
My marriage gave great satisfaction to all parties: to my congregation, by whom my wife was held in the highest estimation; to my parents, and to my friends generally. But here I must except many of my dear wife’s own personal connexions. These lay in the circle of the Church of England, from which she had lately come out, and were persons of the highest respectability in the town and neighbourhood. They were mortified to see her giving herself, her fortune, and her house to a Dissenting minister: and it required no small share of moral courage and decision of character on her part to act in opposition to the views and wishes of so many of her former acquaintances and companions. However, she cared little for all this, believing that she was under the guidance of Providence in this gTcat and important matter.
This dear and eminent woman had few personal charms, but her countenance was intelligent and thoughtful, with a cast of mild and reserved benevolence. Her character, spirit, and temper were a combination of matured female excellence. She had little sprightliness or vivacity; was not obtrusive in conversation, yet was not taciturn, but ever ready with invariable good sense to bear her part in the ordinary subjects of discourse. Her demeanour was grave, but by no means gloomy. Profoundly humble, and beautifully meek, she could never ofi’end, and was rarely offended; though I have known her roused to dignified displeasure on some occasions, both before and after our marriage. Her prudence, sound good sense, sobriety of mind, and correctness of judgment were exemplary. All this was veiled by a delicate and invariable
LIFE OF JOHN ANGELL JAMES.
Autobio- modesty, and sanctified by eminent piety. After our marriage, when ^’’^^ ’ she became better known to the congregation, she was hailed as an angel of God, and I believe that there was not an individual in either the church or the congregation to whom she was not an object of love, interest, and esteem. Never had there existed in our world a more devoted and affectionate daughter. Such wa.s her attachment to her widowed father in his last Ulness, that had he lived much longer, her own life would have fallen a sacrifice to her attempts to prolong his; and it was some time after his death before her constitution recovered the damage it had sustained by her incessant ministrations by night and by day. Her mind was as much tried as her body, in consequence of her father’s want of religion. Unhappily, Dr Smith had imbibed very light views of Divine revelation, and was, I believe, an infidel, or at any rate a sceptic. It was to this dear devoted chUd the very bitterness of death to see her father, on whom she doated and for whose salvation she would have laid down her life, sinking into the grave with no faith or hope of a glorious immortality. How she prayed, and watched for one glimpse of light from Heaven to beam upon his mind, and irradiate the darkness of his dying chamber, she only knew! but, alas, he died” and made no sign and all that was left her, as in other such cases, was to turn away her thoughts from the gloomy subject and leave the decisivn in the hands of a just and merciful God. Such was the blessed woman the Lord gave me, and of whom I feel that I was utterly unworthy; and to whom, under God, to her gentleness and prudence, to her meekness and good sense, to her sobriety of judgment and instinctive propriety, I owe in great measure the formation of my own character and my fair and good start in my ministerial career. And now, at the distance of fifty years from the date of my union with her, and of nearly forty from her death, I record my gratitude to God for this inestimable gift.
In the latter end of March 1807, my wife was prematurely confined; but the child was dead. This same year I lost my kind, good mother. She had lived long enough to see me married, and setting forth in life respectable and respected, and was
DOlVrESTIC HISTORY. extremely anxious I should not be lifted up by my possessions and Autobioprospects. Often, during my wedding visit, which was paid to sapiic’ii’ 2)arents, she would say, “Remember, my son, there is nothing so beautiful as an humble Christian.” Honour to her memory! She was a good, though not a great woman.
In November 1809, my son Thomas was born, and was soon after publicly baptized by myself in Carr’s Lane Chapel. I know it is usual for ministers to employ some ministerial brother to perform this office for them, but I see no reason for this, except that they lose the benefit of exhortation; yet it might be supposed that they are sufficiently acquainted with their duty, if not to render this imnecessary, yet to dispense with it for the sake of the solemn interest which accompanies the act of a father’s dedicating his own child to God.
It was then I commenced my career as an author, by printing for the use of my congregation, but not publishing, the sermon I preached on the occasion, entitled, “Parental Desire, Duty, and Encouragement.” I was not, certainly, actuated by much vanity in this first efibrt of my pen, as is evident by my not ofiering the sermon to the public; though I am not quite sure that it was not as worthy of publication as some other things which, with greater boldness, I have sent out since. I little thought at that time that I should ever be encouraged as I have been to pursue the career of an author.
Another child was born to us in the year 1810; this was a little girl, but she lived only six weeks. In 1814, my daughter Sarah Ann was born, who took joint names after my mother and my wife’s friend, iirs Walford.