Troubled Because Enjoying God's Service

It may seem strange, but it is nevertheless undeniable, that many Christians have been troubled because they were finding enjoyment in God’s service. They have, in fact, been disturbed because they were not disturbed; were unhappy, because they were happy. And, after all, this is by no means to be wondered at, with human nature as it is, and vv’ith God’s grace working as it does. But it is an important aspect of truth to be considered by one who would give help to doubters.

It is true that it is easier to slip down than to clamber up; more inviting to enter the broad and thronged road to death than to walk in the less-trod narrow path that leads to life. But one who continues to toil upward may after a while find enjoyment in

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surmounting obstacles and breathing the purer air of the loftier regions. And as the years go on there is more true enjoyment in the strait and narrow way of life than in the broad and easy road of death. These things are not, however, always borne in mind by one who looks at a single side of the case.

Probably the difficulty was more common in former days than in these; but there are still manifestations of it among believers. It is back of the idea of penance and self-mortification. Many a man has thought he had a better prospect of wearing a white robe in the next life if he wore a haircloth shirt in this. Scourging the body with whips has often been undertaken as a help to saving the soul. This has been practiced not only among heathen and idolaters, but among followers of the Lord Jesus Christ in the later as well as the earlier centuries.

Within my memory it was a prevalent idea that there was a superior sanctity in tlroublcO JSecausc jenjoing (So’s Service

a long face and a gloomy expression of countenance. Cheerfulness in looks or in voice was supposed to be at variance with true religious devotion. If one would rightly observe the Sabbath, he must avoid giving positive evidence of enjoyment or happiness between sundown on Saturday evening and sundown on Sunday evening.

So far did this idea extend that many an earnest Christian actually believed that true enjoyment was inconsistent with a right performance of religious duty. Not only must a man do right whether he found it easy or difficult, pleasant or disagreeable; but to find duty-doing easy and pleasant was an indication of a wrong spirit, if, indeed, it did not show that he had mistaken the path of duty.

As a practical consequence of this way of looking at duty, many felt that to find pleasure in God’s service was to throw suspicion on the acts of service which could cause pleasure rather than pain. Of two lines of effort, one attractive and the other

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repellent, the repellent one was thought to be more likely than the other to be right, because the human heart inclines to evil rather than to good. It may seem strange that any intelligent believer could have reasoned in this way; but that many have thus reasoned cannot be denied. Hence in this case, as in many another, it is the dutv of one who would give help to the doubter to perceive in what he is most unreasonable, and to enable him to see its unreasonable side.

I knew of one instance of this sort which is illustrative of many others. A prominent Christian worker had begun very early in life to walk in the narrow path, and to clamber toward the spiritual heights. His time, all his powers, and his every worldly possession, he counted as a trust committed to his charge, to be used in God’s service. As the years went on he came to find most enjoyment in doing what he felt God would have him do. Nothing else was to be compared with this, in his tTroubleD Because Bnjoisins (5oD’5 Service

estimation. And this began to trouble him. It was so at variance with much that he heard from the pulpit and in the prayer-meeting of his day, and that he read in the current religious literature, that he questioned himself as to the possibility of his being on the wrong track in life. As to the fact that he really enjoyed life in his present course he could have no question. Where was the cause of trouble? Coming to me, whom he knew intimately, he stated the case somewhat in this way:

“For years I have been in the habit of giving systematically a regular portion of my income. As God has prospered me in business affairs, I have for some time had quite ample means to dispose of, and I have been enjoying this distribution. And now the pleasure I find in it is seriously troubling me.”

“Have you been guided in your particular gifts by the enjoyment you would have, or by your sense of duty?”

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“Of course I have tried to do my duty in every instance of giving.”

“What has been the nature of your special gifts?”

“Besides my giving to causes presented in our home church, I have helped persons whom I knew to be in need. I have helped widows and children who required assistance. I have given or loaned money to students struggling for an education.”

“Have you sought prominence by the size of your church donations?”

“On the contrary, I have tried to avoid that. If I desired to give more than usual to a cause on our church list, I would give about as much as would be expected of me in the regular church collection. Then I would send an extra sum anonymously to the society direct. In such ways I have tried to avoid prominence as a giver.”

“How about the needy and worthy persons helped by you; have you given either ostentatiously or recklessly?”

“I have been as careful as possible about

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that. I have avoided prominence and any show of generosity. I have taken the opportunity of quietly lending a hand, as it were, to those who needed a helping hand. In the case of young students, especially those whom I knew desired to be in the ministry, I have made a loan rather than a gift, so that the student might be more independent and self-respecting.”

“Do you think that your gifts have been made for your own reputation or enjoyment, or in the line of supposed duty and at the call of God?”

“Of course I have given in each case as I thought was in the line of duty, and where God would have me give. But I am finding such enjoyment in thus giving that it disturbs me. Where does the self-denial come in? We are told to deny ourselves.”

“We have no right to give in order to gratify self, or in order to secure selfish enjoyment. But do you think there is any merit in personal discomfort, or in doing

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what we shrink from, or what we are reluctant to do?”

“I confess that I have felt that the best doing-, and that reluctant doing, were likely to go together, if, indeed, they were not identical.”

“If that is the way you look at it, and there is any reason, or true ground, for your feeling as you do, I think I can suggest a cure for you, or can propose a plan that will avoid your present trouble. Suppose you try this method.

“When next you learn of a worthy poor widow with children, whom you might be inclined to help, just quietly refrain from giving her of your means, and let her and her little ones suffer. And when you know of some struggling students who have hard work to get on unaided, resolutely abstain from doing as you have done hitherto, and see that they have no help from you.”

“Oh, I couldn’t do that!”

“But wouldn’t it be harder and more discomforting than if you gave?”

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“Of course it would.”

“Well, there is where the self-denial would come in, if the measure of discomfort is the true test of right.”

“I don’t really know that it is.”

“Well, I don’t even think that it is. No, my friend, my idea is, that you’d better do as God would have you do, whether you like it or not, whether it is agreeable or disagreeable. Why should you be troubled while bearing Christ’s yoke and burden in his service, even if it proves, as he promises, that his yoke is easy and his burden is light?”

“I don’t suppose I should, as I now see the matter.”

And from seeing the matter in a new light, that child of God lived for the rest of his life having enjoyment, instead of trouble and worry, in giving help to others as God enabled him.