How Christians Ought to Examine Their Decays of Grace
How Christians ought to examine their decays grace and piety. The greatness of their sin and of their loss under such a declension: GocCs dis” pleasure and departure from them considered to awaken endeavours of a recovery. In what manner the faith of adherence may be acted by one who hath no assurance.
It cannot but be of use to believers also, at stated times, to examine themselves, concerning their languishings and decays in grace, falling from their first love to a spirit of indifierency and lukewarroness, disorderly walking or unfruitfulness; whether “grey hairs are not here and there upon them, and they know it not.” For God may withdraw by degrees, so that his departure may not presently be perceived. And some kind of activity in duty may be continued upon false principles, and from common assistance, while a Christian, as to his spiritual state, may be under a dangerous consumption. It is not difficult for others to observe it sometimes, and would be visible enough to themselves, would they spare a few hours to examine the matter. The puDiahmeot fpi such backslidings, the loss of the quickening and comforting presence of the Holy Spirit deserves likewise to be inquired into, in order to a speedy remedy, and should enforce the counsel.
I man not barely th6 ebbing of affections in the duties of religion, or the want of life and quickening from sensible consolations, which new converts (especially such as have been reclaimed from a course of notorious impiety) have more of at first than afterwards. This, doubting Christians should particularly take notice of, by the instance of the prodigal, who was extraordinarily feasted at his £rst return, but wasp doubtless contented afterwards with the ordinary provisions of his father’s house. Neither doth God dispense the same measure to all alike, nor to any alike at all times; some, who are called to greater services and sufferings than others, or had greater conflicts before conversion, may have a greater share than the rest of their brethren. Neither will the same degree of grace, imparted to some persons, so discernibly move and comfort, as it will do some others of a different temper. It is not, therefore, so much to be the matter of our inquiry (if at all it need to be so) whether we have more or less of sensible joy, in the performance of our duty, but
Whether we are not fallen and declined, as to the inward vital acts of grace, and in the outward fruits of holiness; whether we have such clear convincing apprehensions of divine and spiritual truths, and the mysteries of the gospel, as formerly; whether our minds are not become more vain and heedless; whether our knowledge of God awd of ycv%t revelations of bis will, be as powerful axvd ^^^MiQXk% upon our hearts and lives as heretofore; whether there be not less frequency, less consistency, less inward satisfaction in holy serious thoughts thaq formerly. You were wont to pray, and endeavour that God might be first and last in your thoughts every day, and, by frequent ejaculations in civil affiiirs, to maintain a daily converse with God; but now you mind not whether it be so or not; yea, you cannot but know, that it is not thus with you still. It was once your burden to be pestered with foolish, filthy, worldly, vain thoughts, especially on the Lord’s day, or in the worship of God; you rejected and disowned them, you lamented and prayed against them; do - so much as examine, whether it be thus still.
Consider all your affections, and their several objects; and see whether a criminal lukewarmness, hath not diffused itself into every one of them. Examine every grace, and see whether your faith, hope, love, holy desires, and delight in God, be not miserably abated, as to the strength and vigour, the efiicacy and frequent exercise, of every one of them; so that your thoughts of God are few, cold, and lifeless, without desire, delight, and love.
Consider the opportunities of public worship, and solemn occasions of approaching the divine presence. Are they as much the desire of your souls, and the rejoicing of your hearts, as once they were? Are you not. more easily diverted from them, less satisr fied and refreshed by them ?. Are not all gospel-ordinances less powerful and quickening, and your profit and advantage thereby unspeakably less than formerly? Do you hunger, and thirst, andpant.a the hart after the brooks, to draw nigh to God, and come into his courts? Do you make conscience of preparing beforehand? Do you come with a real desire, and design, and expectation, of profiting and bettering your spirits? Do you join in every part of divine worship with that attention, seriousness, and composure of mind, and taste the sweetness and benefit of such solemnities, as formerly? Are such services performed with that awe of God, with thai humility, fervency, and intenseness of spirit, as sometimes they were? Are you not more negligent and unconcerned before and after, whether you find any thing of this or not? Though your desire a are weak, your heart flat, your thoughts wandering, your spirits trifling, so the work be done, and the ’ duty be over, (in how formal, customary, and careless, a manner soever it be,) you consider it not, you lay it not to heart, you reflect not upon it, you bewail it not, or, at least, are better contented, and sooner quieted, and take less notice of the frame of your heart, in such duties, thau formerly.
Examine, farther, how it is with you as to the ’ great distinguishing duties of an upright Christian; (if performed as they ought to be;). mean secret prayer and meditation; are you as strict and careful, constant and conscientious, frequent and abundant, in these, as formerly? May not our closets and places of retirement witness against us? How seldom are we there! How quickly are we gone! How easily diverted! How soon tired! How do we trifle in that work, and shuffle it over, and take up with the shadow and image of prayer! Our former humble and impprtunate prayers,, joyful thanksgivings, and sweet contemplation of the mjnteries of religioni compared with our present daily practice! ill testify that we are declined and fiiUen.
Moreover, consider the evil of sin, and how your heart stands afiected to it. Are not your hatred of sin, and zeal against it, much decayed; especially with respect to inward spiritual sins, such as the secret workings of unbelief and distrust, pride, envy, uncharitableness, 8cc.? Do you bewaU it, strive against it, and shcin the occasions, and fear the temptations, that may lead you into sin, as once you did? Have you not Ipst much of that tenderness and holy jealousy over your heart and wap you formerly had? Do you not now make more bold with temptation? Are you not oftener conquered? and with less reluctance? and by smaller temptations, &c.?
Are you not more unserviceable? Root and fruit in a withering condition? God less honoured, and others less profited and edified by your example and life? Do you not adhere more to the world? Conform to it, and comply with it in many things, which formerly you dared not have done? And are every day waxing worse? Make a pause awhile, and bethink yourself what this will come to at last, when even the little good that remains is ready to die.
May I not ask such Christians, or desire them to ask themselves. What is already the effect and consequence of this declension? Is not God’s Spirit removed, and the light of his countenance eclipsed? Yea, as to many of them, are they not under sad apprehensions of God’s displeasure? Do they not feel the terrors of the Lord? Do they* not walk faeayily from day to day? They that could once converse with God on all occasions, as a Friend and a Father, do now think of God, and are troubled; thick darkness doth encompass them round about; they have lost the sense of his love, the comforts of his presence, and their song in the night, and see no relief. This is a more hopeful case, however, than their’s, who are under great backsliding and desertion, and hardly sensible of it. To awaken and assist both, consider, I beseech you, whence you are fallen, and what you have lost, and what will be the issue of this, if sickness, or some smart affliction, overtake you, or if you should die in this condition; and inquire seriously and presently into the cause of all this evil; for a few transient thoughts will not affect the heart, and persuade to action; and do it presently, because, by every delay, your work will be the harder, your danger the great* er and your recovery the more difficult. Reflect upon the sinfulness as well as afflictiQn of this case« Know that you have displeased God, and run from him, neglected his presence, and grieved his Spirit, and in what instances you have done so, that hath made him weary of his dwelling; what ordinances you have slighted; what duties you have omitted; what sins you have given way to; in order to repentance and deep humiliation.
Can you contentedly sit still with this dismal state of things, while God hath somewhat (yea, a great deal indeed) against you for having left your first love? Will you not endeavour to remove that which hath made such a separation between God and yoU) and brought you thus low? What com* munion with God, what communication of his graces what influences of his Spirit, and eiddences of his favour, have you lost!. And will you not acknowledge your iniquity, and abase yourselves in the dust, and return to the Lord, and; do your first works, that he may heal your backslidings, and receive you graciously? that you may again take hold of his covenant, and be at peace with him?
But to be at peace with God is not the whole, of your concern; you need not only a pardon, but a physician to heal you; as doth a malefactor, that is not only liable in the law, but desperately sick. Your state is sinful and dangerous, as well as* troublesome. From performing duties in. such -a manner as you now do, you may quickly be tempted to let them altogether alone. God may be so far provoked to suffer Satan to make attempts upon you of that kind, (and he is forward enough to make use of such an opportunity, to try all his snares and stratagems against you,) till he prevail with you to think hardly of God himself, unthankfully to overlook all his former kindnesses, to put the worst interpretation that can be upon all his providences, to distrust and quarrel with him, as if his faithfulness had failed, and his mercy were clean gone for ever, and there were no hope left for one in your case; and so run into desperation, and, through the subtlety and violence of Satan’s temptations, try the most foolish and unlawful means for ease and cure; either open licentiousness, or. it may be, self-murder.
Therefore, speedy, present repentance is necessary to find out aod mortify evety comiptioDi and that especially which conscience tells you you have moat indulged, from whence your distress doth princi* pally arise, confessing your sin freely, fully, and without reserve, and waiting on God in the diligent use of all means, for the recovery of that which you have lost, and justifying God in his righteousness, truth, wisdom, holiness, in all his rebukes, that you may jregain a spirit of prayer, and taste the sweetness, virtue, and efficacy, of every duty, and of every ordinance; and God may give you “the garments of praise for the spirit of heaviness, and the joy. of the Lord may be your strength,” for future service and sufiering.
In the mean time, do not cast away your hope, but, though you have, too justly, deprived yourself of the faith of assurance, yet endeavour to maintain and exercise the faith of adherence; say unto God, that, because there is forgiveness with him, therefore he is to be feared* My sin is not too great to be forgiven; it is not the unpardonable sin; for I desire to repent, and resolve to return. I will still cleave to the Lord and wait upon him, and follow hard after him, and take no other course for deliverance and comfort. Mine is not a single case; I am not the only soul that hath been so distressed, and yet found relief by seeking unto God. It is therefore “good for me to hope, and quietly wait, for the salvation of God.” I will draw near to God; I will lie at his foot, and continue in all ways of worship and duty, wherein I may hope to meet with the quickening and comfort of his Spirit: I will seek re* lief from no other; I will keep as near him as I can; whither else shall I go? He alone hath the wordd of eternal life;*’ he alone can create (what is the fruit of his own lips) peace.
I will encourage mjself in the consideration of his general grace, and the probabilities of his special love; I will recollect my former experiences, when 1 bad some good hope through grace concerning my adoption; “I will remember the years of the right hand of the Most High.” If God will give me so much grace as to continue waiting, I will hope still; and, “though I walk in darkness, and see little or no light, I will stay myself on the Lord;” and if, by the want of sensible consolation, he will make me more humble, and keep me in a greater submission to his will, I will bless his holy name, and derive more comfortable hope from thence, than from the most sweet and sensible consolations I overbad; and look upon humility, self-denial, dependence on God, resignation to him, and hatred of sin as a better sign of his love, than the highest fervours of affection in his service can be.
Oh! that I bad formerly done as much for holiness as I have for comfort! By the enjoyment of the one, I should have had more of the other: the exercise of grace would have discovered the truth of it. Let me therefore accuse and condemn myself, but still trust and love God, and wait upon him. Let me resolve never to choose a new lord or master, or take up with any portion beneath God himself, or any way of hope or salvation but by Jesus Christ, my only Saviour; neither let me forsake the way of faith and holiness, for all the hopes and happiness of this world if put to my choice; but be always able to sayt (blessed be God I now can,) that “I will return to my former husband, for then it was better with me than now.” I had peace and refreshment in my former ways, I will return to them. “Lord, forsake me not utterly I keep not thine anger for ever; cast me not away from thy presence, and take not thy Holy Spirit from me: restore unto me the joy of thy salvation, that my heart may be enlarged, to praise thy name, and to run the way of thy commandments.”